Sue Scheff - P.U.R.E. Satisfaction!

Sue Scheff: Parenting 18 Year Olds

2009-07-25T07:58:00.000-07:00

With my organization, Parents’ Universal Resource Experts, we hear from parents on a daily basis. I can’t count the number of times parents call us when their teenager has become or nearing the legal age to be considered an adult (18 years old) and realize that all their hoping and praying that the negative behavior would change, is only escalating. Don’t be a parent in denial – be a responsible parent and help to get your teenager on a positive track for their future. Don’t wait until you are at your Wit’s End!

“My 18 year old is out of control and I am at my wits end! What can I do?” – Anonymous Parent.

18 – 19 year old teens can be the most difficult to address simply because they are considered adults and cannot be forced to get help. As parents, we have limited to no control. Practicing “Tough Love” is easier said than done, many parents cannot let their child reach rock bottom – as parent’s, we see our child suffering – whether it is needing groceries or a roof over their head and it is hard to shut the door on them.
I think this is one of the most important reasons that if you are a parent of a 16-17 year old that is out of control, struggling, defiant, using drugs and alcohol, or other negative behavior – I believe it is time to look for intervention NOW. I am not saying it needs to be a residential treatment center or a program out of the home, but at least start with local resources such as therapists that specialize with adolescents and preferable offer support groups.

It is unfortunate that in most cases the local therapy is very limited how it can help your teen. The one hour once a week or even twice, is usually not enough to make permanent changes. Furthermore getting your defiant teen to attend sessions can sometimes cause more friction and frustrations than is already happening.

This is the time to consider outside help such as a Therapeutic Boarding School or Residential Treatment Center. However these parents with the 18-19 year olds have usually missed their opportunity. They were hoping and praying that at 16 – 17 things would change, but unfortunately, if not address, the negative behavior usually escalates.

In the past 9+ years I have heard from thousands of parents – and most are hoping to get their child through High School and will be satisfied with a GED. It is truly a sad society of today’s teens when many believe they can simply drop out of school. Starting as early as 14 years old, many teens are thinking this way and we need to be sure they know the consequences of not getting an education. Education in today’s world should be our children’s priority however with today’s peer pressure and entitlement issues, it seems to have drifted from education to defiance – being happy just having fun and not being responsible.

I think there are many parents that debate whether they should take that desperate measure of sending a child to a program and having them escorted there – but in the long run – you need to look at these parents that have 18-19 year olds that don’t have that opportunity. While you have this option, and it is a major decision that needs to be handled with the utmost reality of what will happen if things don’t change.

The closer they are to 18 – the more serious issues can become legally. If a 17+ year old gets in trouble with the law, in many states they will be tried as an adult. This can be scary since most of these kids are good kids making very bad choices and don’t deserve to get caught up the system. As a parent I believe it is our responsible not to be selfish and be open to sending the outside of the home. It is important not to view this as a failure as a parent, but as a responsible parent that is willing to sacrifice your personal feelings to get your child the help they need.

At 18, it is unfortunate, these kids are considered adults – and as parents we basically lose control to get them the help they need. In many cases, if teen/adult know they have no other alternatives and this is the only option the parents will support, they will attend.

Sue Scheff: ADHD - Kids Awareness Series

2009-06-18T10:52:00.000-07:00

Parent networking is a great way to expand resources, tips, advice, and more! Today I was introduced to a new website – Kids Awareness Series. Kara Tamanini has worked in the mental health field for 15 years and specializes in ADHD. Her first book – Understanding ADHD is available now through Amazon and visiting her website.

One of her recent articles is how parents deal with ODD – Oppositional Defiance Disorder.
How Parents can deal with an ODD child

Children with Oppositional Defiant Disorder exhibit an ongoing pattern of resistant, hostile, and uncooperative behaviors. These behaviors are often a challenge for parents and make the child’s behavior very difficult to deal with. Parents need support and undersanding and there are a number of things parents can do to help themselves and their child with ODD. First of all, build on the positive behaviors that you see in your child.

No child is bad every single second of every day. Point out good behaviors and praise them and reinforce the behaviors that are appropriate. Pick your battles! I can not stress this enough. If you argue every single; solitary point, you as the parent will be absolutely exhausted. Yes, I know it is difficult to let some things go as a parent, but you can not address every single thing. Avoid getting into a power struggle. Remember, ODD kids love to argue!

Prioritize the things that you want your child to do. Set up limits/boundaries for your child and stick to them. Bad behavior is only reinforced by you as the parent when consequences for behavior are not consistent. Do not change the consequences or become lax on them, just because you are tired of fighting the fight. Stick to your guns here. You as the parent should manage your own stress level and try to relax. Have interests of your own and try to spend time away. Have a support system in place. Nobody should feel they are alone with no one to rely on.

Take a time out for yourself if you see that you are about to lose your cool. Walk away until you can calm down. Staying in the situation where you are arguing with your child will only exacerbate the situation. Children with ODD often respond to parenting techniques if used consistently and in a positive manner. A behavioral contract is often needed with ODD children, but more on this in my next post.

Learn more about Kara at http://kidsawarenessseries.com/ and follow her at Twitter @KidTherapist

Sue Scheff: Teens and Video Game Addiction

2009-06-02T09:11:00.000-07:00

As summer approaches, I am sure many parents can benefit from learning more about what our kids are playing online or with their handheld digital games. Check out this website with advice and resources to help you naviagate your child and their attraction to video games.

Source: Video Game Addiction

Video game addiction? Yes, it could be common problem in America youth. According to a latest study published in Psychological Science May 2009, a top-tier peer-reviewed scientific publication in psychology, about 8.5 percent of youth between 8 to 18 years old show symptoms of video game addiction.

As one of the most representative scientific study on video game addiction, this publication has been getting a lot of medium attention. As a result, it has been raising concerns from parents. Unsurprisingly, it also raised some debates, from game players and video game makers.
The goal of this website is to provide unbiased information about video game addiction and influence of video game to the daily life of ours and our next generation in both positive and negative ways.

Parents Universal Resource Experts (P.U.R.E.)

2009-05-26T09:20:00.000-07:00

Parent's Universal Resource Experts, Inc. (P.U.R.E.™) is an organization that was founded in 2001 by Sue Scheff. For the past several years Parent's Universal Resource's has assisted families with valuable information and resources for their children and teens that are at risk. Teens that are struggling with today's peer pressure, experimenting with drugs and alcohol, and simply good kids starting to make bad choices. We have many very satisfied families that have used our services. Please take a moment to read some of our testimonials.

Whether you are seeking Boarding Schools, Therapeutic Boarding Schools, Residential Treatment Centers, Wilderness Programs, Christian Schools, Summer Programs, Military Schools and more, Parent's Universal Resource's can offer you options to explore to help educate you in a very important decision for your child and family. We invite you to fill out a Free Consultation Form for more information.

Parent's Universal Resource Expert's™ are parents helping parents. As a parent that experienced and survived a difficult teen, we believe that desperate parents are at high risk of making rash and detrimental decisions in choosing the best placement for their child. Please take a moment to read my story - "A Parent's True Story" - which is one the reasons this organization was created.

As a member of the Better Business Bureau for many years we are an organization that prides ourselves in helping others and bringing families back together.

There are many Doctors, Attorney's, Therapists, Police Departments, Schools, Guidance Counselors, and other professionals that refer Parent's Universal Resource's to families. In many cases, after a family has used our service, they recommend us to their friends and relatives. We have built our reputation on trust and putting families first. At Parent's Universal Resource's we believe in bringing families back together.

In searching for schools and programs we look for the following:

Helping Teens - not Harming Them

Building them up - not Breaking them down

Positive and Nurturing Environments - not Punitive

Family Involvement in Programs - not Isolation from the teen

Protect Children - not Punish them

Sue Scheff: Parenting Websites

2009-05-04T09:29:00.000-07:00

A few months ago I was introduced to this fantastic website for parents of teens and tweens. I recently visited there again, and was again, amazed at the up-to-date articles including deciding on your teen’s allowance, the high costs of having your teen involved in sports, and so much more. I noticed today a educational article on the inside scoop of anonymous tip lines for cyberbullying. Read more and remember, visit this website - it is not only informational, it is bright and cheery!

Source: Tangerine Times

By Myrna Lantzsch

I’ve been working with a local group to educate and develop policy around the issue of cyber-bullying. If you’ve been a reader you’ll know that a friend of mine’s child was a victim of cyber-bullying recently. I discovered some products (this is but one) that I am going to recommend the schools take into consideration. It is computer program that provides an anonymous communication link between the students and the administration. I think we all know that kids are the best resource for knowing what’s going on inside our schools.

Here is a description of the program from their website (Disclaimer: I have not received any product information or free product from this company - I found it via research):

” Experts say in four out of five school shootings, the attackers boasted about their plans to other students beforehand. So how can school officials and law enforcement bridge the communication chasm between students and faculty? Is investing in security cameras and infrastructure improvements the right approach? AnComm believes that if we are to reduce the likelihood of violence in schools, we must put communication at the core of our school safety plan.

Administrators need to give students a way to reach out to counselors and faculty without fear of retribution or embarrassment to seek help or notify those who can help that there are problems inside your school that require attention. ‘Talk About It®’ provides an affordable, easy-to-implement option to immediately breaking the code of silence and getting students to ‘Talk About It®.’

Continue reading this post…

Sue Scheff: Summer Camps and Programs

2009-04-29T07:45:00.000-07:00

Can you even believe that summer is just about here? May 1st is only days away - so are you still looking for a summer camp or program for your teen or tween?

Summer camps can be a great self esteem building opportunity for many kids. If you are still considering summer programs for your child - here are some ideas for your consideration.

Camp Finders® is a free service which matches children ages 6-18 with appropriate overnight summer camps and teen programs.

Since 1994, Camp Finders® has personally visited approximately 175 sleepaway camps and various teen programs. During this time period, Camp Finders™ has been placing children in overnight camps and in the following teen programs: teen tours; wilderness camps & outdoor adventure; college enrichment; community service; sailing, SCUBA, & marine biology programs; foreign language programs and more… Visit www.campfinders.com.

Sue Scheff: Teen Summer Jobs

2009-04-21T06:06:00.000-07:00

Here are 10 tips about where to look and how to act on job interviews

Source: Parenting Today

By Laura T. Coffey

Even in the best of times, teenagers face plenty of hurdles when they look for summer jobs. Would-be employers often worry that they’ll be undependable, late and generally flaky — and teens must convince prospective bosses that they’re actually reliable and responsible.
This summer could be even tougher for teens, though, because competition for jobs is expected to be so fierce. In many cases, teenagers will be going head to head against adults who have years of work experience behind them. And they’ll be doing so in a job market that has fewer positions available.

A recent survey by SnagAJob.com, an employment Web site that connects people with hourly jobs, found that nearly half of hourly hiring managers won’t be recruiting summer employees this year. Even more ominous, 73 percent of hiring managers anticipate receiving more applications this summer than they did last summer from job-seekers of all ages.

Does this mean that teens should abandon all hope of finding gainful employment this summer? Not at all! The following tips can help.

1. Start looking now. Shawn Boyer, chief executive officer of SnagAJob.com, said employers are already thinking about their upcoming summer staffing issues, even though we’re only in the month of April. One way to beat out at least some of the competition is to start your job search early rather than waiting for the school year to end. “Consider telling them, ‘I can work 10 hours a week now, and then I can ramp up my hours after school gets out,’ ” Boyer said.
2. Get the word out about your job search. Begin actively telling people that you’re looking for a job. Think about all the adults in your life: your teachers, guidance counselors and coaches, your family doctor and veterinarian, your parents’ friends, your friends’ parents, and so on. This approach could turn you on to job prospects.

3. Plan for a repeat performance. The survey of more than 1,000 hiring managers revealed that 65 percent of their summer staffs will consist of returning workers. If you had a job last summer and you didn’t absolutely hate it, consider reapplying again this year. Your past employer will be interested in you because you’re already trained.

4. Be professional. Make sure that everything you include in your job application is spelled correctly and is free of grammatical errors. Don’t use all lowercase or all uppercase letters, Boyer advised. Be sure the e-mail address you put down isn’t silly or distracting. The same holds true for the voice-mail prompt on your cell phone or home phone.

5. Do mock interviews in advance. A job interview can be a lot more stressful than you might think. To work out the jitters ahead of time, do a few practice interviews with someone other than a friend or parent, Boyer recommended. “Practice with a guidance counselor, a teacher or a friend’s parent that you’re not that comfortable with so it will be more realistic,” Boyer said.

6. Show some energy. Employers who bring teenagers on board say they appreciate their enthusiasm and eagerness to do whatever it takes to get a job done. Display those traits on your job interview — and on the job, as well.

7. Get appropriately gussied. Dress nicely for your job interview, as if you were about to attend a religious service. Do this even if the dress code for employees is casual. Absolutely remember to send a handwritten thank you note after your interview — a step many adults routinely forget to take.

8. Play up your strengths. Many teens show a tendency to be hard on themselves and minimize their accomplishments. Remember that a job interview is not the place to beat yourself up. Instead, emphasize flattering details about yourself, such as being an honor-roll student, juggling extracurricular activities and volunteering in the community. “List out in particular the leadership positions that you’ve held,” Boyer said. “That helps to dispel the idea that teens aren’t responsible.”

9. Know where to look. As bleak as the job market is right now, Boyer said these places that are still open to hiring teens: fast-food restaurants; movie theaters; merchandising companies that stock shelves for retailers — American Greetings is looking for this sort of help, he noted — and health-care facilities. “There are a wide range of positions in the health-care sector that don’t require you to have a certain level of credentials,” Boyer said. “There’s valet-parking people’s cars, working in a hospital gift shop, working in a cafeteria, being a receptionist.”

10. Consider working at a bank. If you’re at least 18, you also may be able to land a job as a bank teller. Banks often need help over the summer months when many of their employees go on vacation, Boyer said — and he added that a bank job can look good on your resume.

Sources and resources:

SnagAJob.com
Youth2Work.gov, the U.S. Labor Department’s Web site for teens
Occupational Safety and Health Administration

Sue Scheff: Inhalant Use

2009-04-14T06:30:00.000-07:00

About a year ago, a mother emailed me about her son’s tragic death - it wasn’t your typical drug overdose, it was normal household items that teens/kids are now using as a high. Inhalant Abuse is not discussed enough, and needs to be. These items are much easier for teens to find and a lot less expensive. A cheap high? It is awful to even have to think like this, but parents needs to be aware and take pre-cautions. As always, communication with our teens is number #1 - and I recommend you visit http://www.inhalant.org/ for more valuable information about this potentially deadly habit.

Source: Connect with Kids

“They didn’t want to believe that I had a problem … their little girl, you know?”
– Kelli Crockett, 18 years old

Five years ago, 18-year-old Kelli Crockett was already drinking and smoking pot, but she wanted a different “high.”

“And I remember in middle school, actually a drug awareness program hearing about the inhalants, like the household products, you know, and I was like, ‘I know we’ve got something around the house,’ and I really wanted to get messed up,” Kelli says.

Air freshener, glue, paint thinner, furniture polish, hair spray: The government estimates over 17 percent of adolescents have tried inhalants at least once.

Certified Addiction Counselor Ashley Kilpatrick explains: “It’s accessible, I mean, that’s what the problem with inhalants is that they’re just so easy, they’re under the kitchen sink.”
Inhalants cut off oxygen to the brain, and that makes them extremely dangerous. Huffing just once can kill.

“It just feels toxic … you’re high for five minutes and then you feel sick,” Kilpatrick says.
Kelli adds, “I hated the way it made me feel, but … when I didn’t have anything else to use or drink or smoke, I did it cause it was around.”

Experts say a child who’s high on inhalants may seem drunk or disoriented. Parents should also look for signs around the house, like aerosol cans that are out of pressure or punctured on the bottom. There’s also a hangover effect.

“Headaches afterwards, dehydration, you know, bad moods, all that can last up to 24 hours after a use,” Kilpatrick says.

But experts say parents won’t see the signs if they’re in denial.
Kelli says it took an overdose that nearly killed her for her parents to notice. “They didn’t want to believe that I had a problem … their little girl, you know?” she says.

Tips for Parents

Nail polish remover, paint thinner, canned whipping cream, marking pens: Each of these common household items – and literally hundreds more – can be abused by inhaling. Inhalants are volatile substances that produce chemical vapors that induce a psychoactive, or mind-altering, effect when inhaled. Kids sniff, or “huff,” to get high.

According to the National Clearinghouse for Alcohol and Drug information (NCADI), sniffing can cause sickness and death. Victims may become nauseated, forgetful and unable to see things clearly. They may lose control of their bodies, including the use of arms and legs. The effects can last 15 to 45 minutes after inhaling. In addition, sniffing can severely damage the brain, heart, liver and kidneys. Even worse, victims can die suddenly – without any warning. It’s called “Sudden Sniffing Death,” which can occur during or right after sniffing. Even first-time abusers have been known to die from breathing inhalants.

More than 1,000 products are potential inhalants that can kill, including:

Cleaning agents
Computer agents
Correction fluid
Deodorizers
Freon
Gases (whippets, butane, propane)
Gasoline
Glue
Hair spray
Lighter fluid
Markers
Paint products
How can you tell if your child may be abusing inhalants? The NCADI lists the following symptoms to look for in your child:
Unusual breath odor or chemical odor on clothing
Slurred or disoriented speech
Drunk, dazed or dizzy appearance
Signs of paint or other products where they wouldn’t normally be, such as on the face or fingers
Red or runny eyes or nose.
Spots and/or sores around the mouth
Nausea and/or loss of appetite
Appears anxious, excitable, irritable or restlessness (chronic inhalers)
Inhalant abusers also may show the following behaviors:
Sits with a pen or marker near nose
Constantly smells clothing sleeves
Shows paint or stain marks on the face, fingers or clothing

Hides rags, clothes or empty containers of the potentially abused products in closets and other places

If you suspect your child or someone you know is an inhalant abuser, you should consider seeking professional help. Contact a local drug rehabilitation center or other service available in your community.

References
National Clearinghouse for Alcohol and Drug Information
National Institute on Drug Abuse

Sue Scheff: Teen Acne and the Psychological Effects

2009-04-07T05:22:00.000-07:00

By Johana Curtis (Licensed Skin Care Professional)

Teenage Acne Psychological Effects Can Be Severe

As a group that deals with troubled teens on a daily basis, we can see how particular issues unique to teenagers can exacerbate the already difficult time some kids have. Teenage acne psychological effects can be severe enough to cause depression and lower self esteem. Add this to all the other issues commonly found with difficult teens and the result can be problematic. However, there is a way to alleviate the issues surrounding acne in teenagers. Removing this issue can do wonders with a teenager’s self esteem and make it easier to relate to them, especially if they have other psychological issues.

In order to deal with the problem it is important to have some information on teenage acne. The first thing you should know about it is how it occurs. Once there is an understanding of what causes acne then it is easier to find ways to cure it. Teenage acne tips can help ensure the problem is lessened to an extent that it no longer affects the child adversely. Having healthy, clear skin can boost a teenager’s self confidence. Not being self conscious about their appearance will make a teen easier to help when they have problems resulting from other factors in their life.

So, why does acne occur in the first place? Many theories have been bandied about throughout the ages. Most of them, however, are myths and are actually not directly responsible for causing teenage acne. Clothing that is worn, working out excessively and certain types of food are not the root cause of acne. All of those issues may at times make acne worse than it normally would be but it is not the cause of the problem. The cause is simply a hormonal imbalance. Teenagers go through significant hormonal changes when they hit puberty as it is. An imbalance will bring about acne that can sometimes be severe enough to affect a teen’s appearance and self esteem.

If hormonal changes are the cause of acne, is there anything that can be done about it? Yes, there is. There are two basic ways acne should be treated in order to ensure a long term, positive effect. First, the skin should be treated. This is typically done via over the counter topical products. Teenagers should get into the habit of taking care of their skin. Purchasing scrubs, cleansers and lotions will suffice to begin a proper skin care regimen that should be used daily.

The purpose of the topical treatments is twofold. First, the teenager gets into a healthy habit of maintaining proper skin care that will last throughout their life. Also, acne that already exists will be cured more quickly and the skin will have a fresh, clean appearance in no time at all. The teenager will be pleased with the results and will have a better outlook about their appearance.

But, topical treatments are not the sole solution that should be explored. There should also be treatment for the root cause of acne, the hormones. In order to treat the hormonal imbalance it is necessary to use supplements. This will naturally restore the hormones to the proper balance, alleviating the acne problem and will prevent it from returning. There are many natural supplements available from health food stores and vitamin shops.

However, there are a few products on the market designed specifically to resolve the problem of teenage acne and include both topical creams and supplements. These products treat the problem from the inside out and are convenient to use because everything is sold in one package. These all inclusive products can be found in health food stores, in the skin care aisles of stores and are also available online. Most supplements are taken once or twice per day and the skin cleansers and creams are also used once or twice per day. This is convenient for the teen to use and makes them less prone to forget to use it.

A hormonal imbalance is the primary cause of teenage acne. Other factors may exacerbate the issue but that is where the topical cleansers come into play. The dietary supplements will treat the root cause of the acne, the hormonal imbalance. With proper treatment, a teenager can feel more confident about facing the other difficulties that occur with teens. Unfortunately, the teenage years can be difficult and sometimes more severe problems can occur.

A teenager who suffers from acne can exhibit signs of depression and withdraw from peers and adults alike. Curing acne can not remove all the difficulties teenagers must face on a daily basis but it can eliminate one of the issues that cause severe emotional problems and self esteem issues. If you understand how acne occurs and how to treat it, curing acne in a teen can be easier than it may seem.

Sue Scheff: Teen Depression

2009-04-01T09:01:00.001-07:00

As I saw on the news last night, experts are saying that parents with children between the ages of 12-18 should have them screened for depression. It is not about promoting medication, it is about helping to understand if there are areas in their lives that can be causing stress and anxiety that can leave to making negative choices such has experimenting with substance abuse, hanging with a less than desirable peer group, feelings of low self worth, etc. Like adults, children can be prone to depression and stress and not mature enough to understand these feelings. With this, acting out in a negative way can follow. Take time to learn more.

Source: USA Today

Experts: Doctors should screen teens for depression.

If you have teens or tweens, government-appointed experts have a message: U.S. adolescents should be routinely screened for major depression by their primary care doctors. The benefits of screening kids 12 to 18 years old outweigh any risks if doctors can assure an accurate diagnosis, treatment and follow-up care, says the independent U.S. Preventive Services Task Force.It’s a change from the group’s 2002 report concluding there wasn’t enough evidence to support or oppose screening for teens. The task force, though, says there’s still insufficient proof about the benefits and harms of screening children 7 to 11 years old.

Depression strikes about 1 out of 20 teens, and it’s been linked to lower grades, more physical illness and drug use, as well as early pregnancy.

Questionnaires can accurately identify teens prone to depression, plus there’s new evidence that therapy and/or some antidepressants can benefit them, the expert panel says in a report in today’s Pediatrics . But careful monitoring is vital since there’s “convincing evidence” that antidepressants can increase suicidal behavior in teens, the report says.

Accompanying the task force advisory in Pediatrics is a research review saying there have been few studies on the accuracy of depression screening tests, but the tests “have performed fairly well” among adolescents. Treatment can knock down symptoms of depression, say the reviewers from Kaiser Permanente and the Oregon Evidence-Based Practice Center in Portland, Ore.

In a “show me the money” volley back, pediatricians also weigh in on the topic in today’s issue of their journal. Insurance plans and managed care companies that stiff or under-pay pediatricians for mental health services throw up barriers to mental health care in doctors’ offices, says the American Academy of Pediatrics. Kids’ doctors should be compensated for screenings, as well as consults with mental health specialists and parents, AAP recommends.

Sue Scheff: 3 Smart ADHD Stategies Studies

2009-03-23T07:43:00.001-07:00

Source: ADDitude Magazine

Tips to help ADHD students fine-tune their study strategies for specific test formats: multiple choice, essay, and math/science tests.

Many parents of students with attention deficit disorder (ADHD) want to pull out their hair. And most share the same school-related frustration. “She knew the material at home, but she flunked the test.”

What students with ADHD know — or think we know — is not always on the test. The cardinal rule for studying smarter is: “It’s not what you know, it’s what your teacher wants you to know.”

Because we often wait until the last minute to study, we forget this rule. We study hard — but we study the wrong material. Or, in a rush, we don’t dig deep enough into the material, even though that’s what the teacher expects us to do. I’ve been there and done that.

A week before the test, make a rough outline or study guide. Show it to your teacher and ask her if you’re studying the right material, if you’ve missed anything, and where to focus your efforts. After you’ve targeted the relevant material, consider the test format: Different kinds of tests require different study strategies.

Continue reading about Multiple-Choice Exams…

Sue Scheff: Stopping Online Violence

2009-03-11T07:53:00.001-07:00

Source: Love Our Children USA

Violence against children is completely preventable!

Get Angry And SAVE A Child.

Reporting Online Crime Against Children

Keeping kids safe from harm and violence is up to everyone of us!

Be Informed ... Be Involved ...Make a Difference in a Child's Life

Violence against children only ends when a child comes forward or a concerned person recognizes the warning signs and reports the abuse.

Sometimes, people may fear getting personally involved or they may be in denial of a child they know who is being hurt. Child violence is a problem on the national and local levels that requires action in the form of caring individuals in each community.

And now the Internet has become a real danger to kids of all ages.

A person’s actions, or lack of action, not only affects the abused child, but everyone in our country.

Click Here To Report Non-Online Violence Against Children

Reporting Internet Crime

http://www.cybertipline.com

The Cybertipline handles leads on a variety of Internet criminal activity and is forwarded to law enforcement. Learn what you can do if you suspect illegal or dangerous activity online.

You can file reports at http://www.cybertipline.com or call your local police force or law enforcement agency, i f you know a child who is in danger or at risk of an online crime.

Definition of Online Crimes

Possession, Manufacture, and Distribution of Child Pornography
Child pornography has been defined under federal statute as a visual depiction of a minor (child younger than 18) engaged in sexually explicit conduct

Online Enticement of Children for Sexual Acts
Use of the Internet to entice, invite, or persuade a child to meet for sexual acts, or to help arrange such a meeting, is a serious offense

Prostitution of Children

Prostitution is generally defined as performing, offering, or agreeing to perform a sexual act for any money, property, token, object, article, or anything of value

Sex Tourism Involving Children

It is against the law for any United States citizen to travel abroad to engage in sexual activity with any child under the age of 18. Individuals who partake in this illegal activity are subject to prosecution in the United States even if they committed the crime on foreign soil.

Child Sexual Molestation (not in the family)
Child sexual exploitation (not in the family), also known as extra-familial child sexual abuse, includes all sexual exploitation of a child by someone other than a family member.

Unsolicited Obscene Material Sent to a Child

It is an unfortunate reality of the Internet that children will encounter obscene aterial online. Many times this material is attached as an image(s) or hyperlink(s) sent to a child in an unsolicited E-mail or “spam.”

To combat this problem NCMEC takes reports of unsolicited obscene material sent to a child. It is a violation of criminal law for any person to knowingly or attempt to send or transfer obscene material to another individual who has not attained the age of 16 years

Please report any incidents where a child may have received visual depictions of persons engaging in sexually explicit conduct that is obscene.

If you are an adult who is concerned about adult obscenity not involving children on the Internet, please make a report to www.obscenitycrimes.org.

Misleading Domain Name

It is a federal offense to use a misleading domain name on the Internet with the intent to deceive a minor into viewing material that is harmful to minors, regardless of whether the material meets the legal definition of obscenity. Please report the use of a misleading domain name that has directed a child to a web site containing harmful materials to children.

Adults who are concerned about obscenity that has not been accessed by a child on the Internet may file a report at www.obscenitycrimes.org.

REPORT ALL VIOLENCE AGAINST CHILDREN!
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Facts You Should Know About Violence Against Children

Forms of Violence and Neglect Against Children

What Makes People Harm and Neglect Children

What You Can Do To Help

Resources To Help You

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Sue Scheff: Tools to Stop Medicine Abuse

2009-03-05T15:37:00.001-08:00

As a parent advocate, I continually receive information from a wide range of resources. Educating parents today about what our teens and pre-teens are facing is critical to raising our children. Today, as in many generations before, there are new concerns and challenges that parents face. Whether it is social networking, peer pressure, or substance abuse - parents need to stay in touch.

Communication should be a parent number 1 priority with today’s teens and pre-teens.
The Consumer Healthcare Products Association (CHPA), founded in 1881, is a member-based association representing the leading manufacturers and distributors of nonprescription, over-the-counter (OTC) medicines and nutritional supplements. Many CHPA member products provide millions of Americans with safe, effective, and convenient therapies for the treatment and prevention of many common ailments and diseases.

Studies and common sense tell us that parents play a critical role in preventing substance abuse among teens by simply talking to them about it. CHPA’s Stop Medicine Abuse initiative empowers parents, as well as other community members, to get educated and take action in a variety of ways. Ultimately, the goal is to make sure parents talk to their kids before someone else does.

Sue Scheff: 20th Annual Teen Study from Drug Free America

2009-02-26T14:06:00.000-08:00

Data Reveal First Major Increase in Number of Teens Reporting “Learning a Lot” About Risks of Drug Use

From Parents Teen Abuse of Prescription and Over-The-Counter Medicines Remains a Serious Concern

NEW YORK, NY – February 24, 2009 – The Partnership for a Drug-Free America today announced the findings from the 2008 Partnership Attitude Tracking Study, (PATS) which revealed the first major increase in the number of teens who reported “learning a lot” about the risks of drugs from their parents. The study shows that 37 percent of teens reported learning a lot about the risks of drugs from their parents, a significant 16 percent increase from the previous year and the first major increase since the inception of the study. Research consistently shows that teens who learn a lot about the risks of drugs at home are up to 50 percent less likely to use, yet many parents have difficulty talking with their kids about drugs and alcohol.

Read the entire article here: http://www.drugfree.org/Portal/About/NewsReleases/20th_Annual_Teen_Study#

Sue Scheff: Teen Communication with Parents

2009-02-20T10:33:00.000-08:00

I hear all the time how parents can’t talk to their teens, or should we say, can’t get our teens to listen. In many situations it is how we as parents approach our teens. It seems like a game, but the end result is worth it. Opening up the lines of communication can be critical in today’s teen generation. Here is a great tip list from Shoulder to Shoulder.

Source: Shoulder to Shoulder

When talking with teens, keep the following in mind:

IT’S ALL ABOUT THE APPROACH.

Don’t blast teens with “20 questions” when they first walk in the door. Catch them when they are genuinely ready to talk. However, you may have to create that moment by going out for ice cream, taking a bike ride or working on a project together.

If you’re upset with your teen, you can’t solve a problem effectively. Give yourself some time to cool down before addressing the issue.

Keep the situation in perspective. It’s normal for teens to push the boundaries. Let them experience how to question what they see, and to develop skills in reasoning with you. That way, they will learn to think for themselves to deal with peer pressure and other teen issues.

ARE YOU READY TO TALK?

Avoid telling teens “this is how it’s going to be.” Be respectful by asking for their perspective of the situation - and really listen to them. Try to find a solution together.
Pose your questions as open-ended questions instead of yes-no questions.

Don’t accept “I don’t know” as a response. Instead try, “Tell me how you see it.”

Tell a joke or humorous story to relieve a tense situation, but don’t make fun of teens. Their self-esteem can be fragile.

Don’t solve problems for them. Our teens will not be living with us forever. To let them grow, we should look for opportunities for them to make their own decisions.

Get right to the point and be clear about your concerns. Explain why you feel the way you do, and then describe what you want or need in the future. Be ready to listen to what your teen needs, too.

If you already know the answer, don’t ask the question. For example, if you clearly disapprove of your teen’s outfit, don’t ask, “What are you wearing?!” Instead, you might try, “I’m concerned about that outfit. It’s revealing and I don’t want others to get the wrong idea about you. Please choose something else.”

Teens know they can wear down most adults with sheer repetition and persistence. When a discussion has reached the “wheel spinning” point, end it. To continue is to ask for trouble, as frustration may cause things to be said that we’ll regret.

Listen up. If teens see us as adults that will not listen to them, they will stop talking to us. Force yourself to listen. If necessary, count to 100 before responding and avoid giving unwanted advice or lecturing.
Tell them often how much you love them.

PRINTABLE VERSION FOR DOWNLOAD

You’ll need Adobe Acrobat Reader to view the following PDF version of this section. If you don’t already have the program, you can download it for free here.
Talking with teens.pdf

Sue Scheff - Power Moms Unite - Parenting ADHD

2009-02-05T14:05:00.001-08:00

I love stumbling over great new parenting websites - and what a name - Power Moms Unite - Founder, Candace McLane offer a wide variety of articles, thoughts, tips, parenting resources and more on ADHD. As a mother of an ADHD son, I really enjoy this site. Check her Blog out too - great up to date info!

What is a Power Mom????

Power Moms are moms working to successfully balance the needs of child, family, and self. Some work outside the home, balancing a career with the needs of their child, family and personal self. Other moms are working from home, managing families while managing a small home-based business or managing large families and a homeschool. There are a wide range of us- all power moms- looking to do our best at our many hats as mom- be that nuturer, coach, educator, cheerleader, psychologist, disciplinarian, party arranger, role-model, etc. The roles are vast and numerous, the balance often difficult to strike. This site hopes to empower these moms by providing timely, valuable and informative resources for celebrating family life and successfully managing ADHD.

Parents Universal Resource Experts - Sue Schefff - Pre-Teens and Peer Pressure

2009-01-31T06:11:00.000-08:00

Source: About.com

When your preteen first starts middle school they may be facing real peer pressure for the first time. Experimenting with smoking, drugs and skipping school does start at this age. This is because these recently elementary school graduates want to fit in with the older crowd. Here are some things you can do to help your preteen be prepare for when they are asked to do something that they normally wouldn't do.

Be the first to say something. If you haven't talked to your preteen about drugs, smoking or anything else they could be facing because they haven't had to face that problem yet, talk to them now! Don't avoid it until it becomes a problem or you start to see "signs". Be proactive with your preteen.

Role play. Let your preteen be the one who offers you a cigarette. This will be an eye opening experience. Say no and keep saying no. When you preteen says, "I couldn't say that", ask them what they could say or do. Then role play with your preteen saying no. Practice until your preteen feels comfortable enough to do it on his own with his friends. Learn how to role play here.

Being rude is sometimes okay. Let your teenager know it is okay to avoid people who are trying to get him to do something he does not want to do, even if it is an old friend.Let them make you the scape-goat. Tell your preteen that there is nothing wrong with using you as an excuse. Saying, "My mom would be so mad!" to a friend who is trying to get them to smoke is a perfectly good enough excuse to get out of the situation.

Be available. Be ready and available should they need to come to you with questions or thoughts on a situation. Even if your teen didn't make the right choices, you can help them come up with a better solution the next time the situation arises.
Learn more here.

Sue Scheff - Parenting Teens Today

2009-01-21T07:15:00.001-08:00

O-kay, I am in Florida and have a soft spot for oranges and tangerines, but when I discovered a new Parenting Website that promotes today’s teen issues and parents concerns, I had to share it with you. Tangerine Times, created by Myrna Lantzsch, offers a variety of Parenting Tips, Articles, Blogs and more. Her motto: The Sweet and Sour Life with Teens.

Recently Myrna wrote about Teens and Texting while Driving - and this is huge concern for many of us. We are hearing more and more how car accidents due to cell phone use are increasing, and we need to educate our teens of the dangers of using their phones while driving.
Here is her follow up article:

In an effort to provide additional information and updates on the subject of “Texting While Driving” post - I discovered this story on Salon.com.

In the article, they discuss other technologies to aide with the “disabling” of a cell phone for texting purposes. Both of the companies discussed, (WQN, Inc. and Aegis Mobility) both utilize the car’s Global Positioning System to disable the cell phone.

I still think the best approach is to turn off texting at certain times (especially when the teenager is just beginning to drive) and/or have them leave the phone at home. I know this is unheard of anymore, no one thinks they can do without a cell phone around. But, I’m beginning to think that the temptation to text or use the phone can be very tempting. And, it is even more of a distraction than loud music or maybe, even, another teen in the car.

I’m still researching this subject and will continue to supply updates. As usual, I am particularly interested in hearing from you readers…what do you think? What have you tried?

Wit's End! Advice and Resources for Saving Your Out of Control Teen by Sue Scheff

2009-01-16T17:50:00.000-08:00

Learn more about Wit's End at www.witsendbook.com and author Sue Scheff at www.suescheff.com -the response has been overwhelming! If you are struggling with your teen today - pick up Wit's End and learn more!

Sue Scheff: Teenage Gangs

2009-01-11T07:36:00.000-08:00

Teen Gangs and Teen Cults

Gangs prey on the weak child that yearns to fit in with a false illusion they are accepted into the “cool crowd”. With most Gangs as with Teen Cults, they can convince your child that joining “their Gang or Cult” will make them a “well-liked and popular” teen as well as one that others may fear. This gives the teen a false sense of superiority. Remember, many of today’s teens that are acting out negatively are suffering with extremely low self confidence. This feeling of power that they believe a gang or cult has can boost their esteem; however they are blinded to the fact that is dangerous. This is how desperate some teens are to fit in.

In reality, it is a downward spiral that can result in damage both emotionally and psychically. We have found Teen Gangs and Teen Cults are sometimes hard to detect. They disguise themselves to impress the most intelligent of parents. We have witnessed Gang members who will present themselves as the “good kid from the good family” and you would not suspect their true colors.
If you suspect your child is involved in any Gang Activities or any Cults, please seek local therapy* and encourage your child to communicate. This is when the lines of communication need to be wide open. Sometimes this is so hard, and that is when an objective person is always beneficial. Teen Gangs and Teen Cults are to be taken very seriously. A child that is involved in a gang can affect the entire family and their safety. Take this very seriously if you suspect your child is participating in gang activity or cult association.

Learn more click here.

Need help - visit www.helpyourteens.com

Sue Scheff 2009 Parenting Teens in Cyberspace for the Future

2009-01-04T16:39:00.001-08:00

As a parent advocate, I encourage parents to learn more about online safety. A great place to start is Reputation Defender! Remember, your child may be a "child" today, but soon they will be applying to college and filling out employment applications. Will their online profile be acceptable?

Take a moment to learn more!

What is MyChild?

MyChild by ReputationDefender scours the Internet for all references to your child or teen - by name, photography, screen name, or social network profiles - and packages it to you in an easy-to-understand report. Worried about bullies? Concerned that your teens' friends and peers are posting inappropriate materials online? MyChild searches every corner of the Internet for traces of your kids. If you want to help your teen manage their online reputation, but have felt powerless to do so, ReputationDefender is your answer!

Parents Universal Resource Experts - Sue Scheff - Teen Obesity

2008-12-23T10:23:00.000-08:00

Learn more about keeping your kids in good health. Especially with more and more kids sitting behind their computer screens we need to encourage more activities!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SRSGUZrOU_w
Here is a recent News Article

Seven ways to help your overweight teen

On paper, the statistics are shocking enough: the obesity rate for teens has tripled over the past 25 years and with this increase an average weight, type 2 diabetes, once unknown in young people, is now diagnosed in 45 percent of all new cases involving children or teens. Medical experts fear that high blood pressure and heart disease could become increasingly prevalent among young adults, making this generation of teens the first to have potentially poorer health and shorter life spans than their parents.

Seeing a young person you love struggle with overweight or obesity in the sensitive pre-teen or teen years is painful, frustrating and alarming — from watching them deal with cruel remarks to seeing them on the sidelines in sports or social events or knowing that they face significant health risks even in young adulthood. Maybe you’ve nagged or dropped hints or taken your child for medical help or sent him or her to weight loss camps — all to no avail.

Doctor Kathy McCoy, author of “The Teenage Body Book,” explains how you can help your teen lose weight and feel better!

• Put the emphasis on good health, not weight, and make it a goal for the whole family. Teens hate being singled out and criticized. Approaching this from a “YOU need to lose weight!” point of view will guarantee a battle of the wills. Instead, ask for your teen’s help in making an action plan to promote better family eating and exercise habits.

• Have real family meals at least once a day and encourage your teen to eat what the family eats. Frantic family schedules have equaled fast food or processed, prepared food dinners — and expanding waistlines. With real, home-cooked meals, you can better control calories, fats, sugars, sodium and other nutritional issues.

• Look at and discuss all of your less than ideal eating behaviors. Maybe your teen craves junk food when she’s bored and watching TV. Maybe you dive into high calorie comfort food when you’re angry or frustrated. Pay attention to the difference between physical and emotional hunger. Discuss all this with your family — and come up with ways to comfort or reward yourselves that have nothing to do with food.

• Make it convenient for everyone in the family to eat breakfast. Advance planning can help: fresh fruit and yogurt in the fridge, whole grain bread and cereals in the pantry, and encouraging all to get up and get going early enough in the morning to grab a bite. Those who don’t eat breakfast tend to overeat during the rest of the day, especially in the evening

• Get your family moving. Trying to motivate an overweight teen to go to the gym can be frustrating and non-productive. Schedule exercise into your family routine: a family walk or bike ride after dinner doesn’t have to cut into homework or leisure time too dramatically — and the exercise is good for everyone.

• Become smart, skeptical consumers: There are no weight loss miracles. Help your teen to avoid quick fixes. The weight didn’t come on overnight and it can’t be lost — for good — overnight either. The goal should be health improvement with a slow, steady weight loss of no more than two pounds a week. The loss can add up to more than 100 pounds in a year — and weight lost slowly as one changes one’s eating and exercise habits is more likely to stay off.

• Make a vow — together — to enjoy a full and healthy life now. You don’t have to wait until you or your teen is slim to do this. With good health as your top family priority, you can feel better starting today. Good nutrition, regular exercise and the feeling that “we’re all in this together” can make a positive difference for everyone in your family.

Award-winning writer and author of “The Teenage Body Book,” Dr. Kathy McCoy is a teen psychology and health expert who has appeared as a guest on such programs as The Today Show and The Oprah Winfrey Show. Winner of the American Library Associations’ Best Book for Young Adults Award, “The Teenage Body Book” contains everything teenagers and their parents need to know about nutrition, health, fitness, emotions and sexuality.

Parents Universal Resource Experts - Sue Scheff - Parenting Teens Today

2008-12-14T07:42:00.000-08:00

Are you at your wit’s end?

Are you experiencing any of the following situations or feeling at a complete loss or a failure as a parent? You are not alone and by being a proactive parent you are taking the first step towards healing and bringing your family back together.

Is your teen escalating out of control?
Is your teen becoming more and more defiant and disrespectful?
Is your teen manipulative? Running your household?
Are you hostage in your own home by your teen’s negative behavior?
Is your teen angry, violent or rage outbursts?
Is your teen verbally abusive?
Is your teen rebellious, destructive and withdrawn?
Is your teen aggressive towards others or animals?
Is your teen using drugs and/or alcohol?
Does your teen belong to a gang?
Do they frequently runaway or leave home for extended periods of time?
Has their appearance changed – piercing, tattoo’s, inappropriate clothing?
Has your teen stopped participating in sports, clubs, church and family functions? Have they become withdrawn from society?
Is your teen very intelligent yet not working up to their potential? Underachiever? Capable of doing the work yet not interested in education.
Does he/she steal?
Is your teen sexually active?
Teen pregnancy?
Is your teen a good kid but making bad choices?
Undesirable peers? Is your teen a follower or a leader?
Low self esteem and low self worth?
Lack of motivation? Low energy?
Mood Swings? Anxiety?
Teen depression that leads to negative behavior?
Eating Disorders? Weight loss? Weight gain?
Self-Harm or Self Mutilation?
High School drop-out?
Suspended or Expelled from school?
Suicidal thoughts or attempts?
ADD/ADHD/LD/ODD?
Is your teen involved in legal problems? Have they been arrested?
Juvenile Delinquent?
Conduct Disorder?
Bipolar?
Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD)?

Does your teen refuse to take accountability and always blame others for their mistakes?

Do you feel hopeless, helpless and powerless over what options you have as a parent? Are you at your wit’s end?

Does any of the above sound familiar? Many parents are at their wit’s end by the time they contact us, but the most important thing many need to know is you are not alone. There is help but the parent needs to be proactive and educate themselves in getting the right help.

Many try local therapy, which is always recommended, but in most cases, this is a very temporary band-aid to a more serious problem. One or two hours a week with a therapist is usually not enough to make the major changes that need to be done.

If you feel you are at your wit’s end and are considering outside resources, please contact us. http://www.helpyourteens.com/free_information.shtml An informed parent is an educated parent and will better prepare to you to make the best decision for your child. It is critical not to place your child out of his/her element. In many cases placing a teen that is just starting to make bad choices into a hard core environment may cause more problems. Be prepared – do your homework.

Many parents are in denial and keep hoping and praying the situation is going to change. Unfortunately in many cases, the problems usually escalate without immediate attention. Don’t be parents in denial; be proactive in getting your teen the appropriate help they may need. Whether it is local therapy or outside the home assistance, be in command of the situation before it spirals out of control and you are at a place of desperation. At wit’s end is not a pleasant place to be, but so many of us have been there.

Finding the best school or program for your child is one of the most important steps a parent does. Remember, your child is not for sale – don’t get drawn into high pressure sales people, learn from my mistakes. Read my story at www.aparentstruestory.com for the mistakes I made that nearly destroyed my daughter.

In searching for schools and programs we look for the following:
· Helping Teens - not Harming them
· Building them up - not Breaking them down
· Positive and Nurturing Environments - not Punitive
· Family Involvement in Programs - not Isolation from the teen
· Protect Children - not Punish them

Sue Scheff Parenting Troubled Teens

2008-12-07T06:53:00.000-08:00

It stems back to “children need to have their self-esteem built up to make good decisions.” Today most families are either single parent or both parents are working full time. This is not the fault of the teen, nor is it the fault of the parents. It is today’s world and we must try to find the middle. Troubled teens, rebellious teens, angry teens, problem teens, difficult teens, peer pressure, depressed teens; unfortunately are part of the society of adolescents today.Communication is always the first to go when people get busy. We have seen this over and over again. We have also experienced it and feel that our children shut us out; this can lead to difficult teens and teens with problems. Although we are tired and exhausted, along with the stress of today’s life, we need to stop and take a moment for our kids.

Talk and LISTEN to them. Ask lots of questions, get to know their friends and their friend’s parents, take part in their interests, be supportive if they are having a hard time, even if you can’t understand it; be there for them.This all sounds so easy and so simple, but take it from parents that have walked this path, it is not easy. When a parent works a full day, has stress from the job along with household chores, not to mention the bills, it is hard to find that moment. We are all guilty of neglect at one time or another after all, we are only human and can only do so much. We feel the exhaustion mounting watching our teens grow more out of control, yet we are too tired to address it.

Out of control teens can completely disrupt a family and cause marriages to break up as well as emotional breakdowns.We know many feel it is just a stage, and with some, it may be. However most times it does escalate to where we are today. Researching for help; Parents’ Universal Resource Experts is here for you, as we have been where you are today.

Do you have a difficult teen, struggling teen, defiant teen, out of control teen, rebellious teen, angry teen, depressed teen? Do you feel hopeless, at your wits end?

Visit www.helpyourteens.com.

Sue Scheff: Teens: Sex in the Media

2008-12-01T10:57:00.000-08:00

Source: Connect with Kids

“Every TV show now has like at least one character who is like a slut.”

– Katie Seewald, 14 years old

Parents have heard a thousand times that sex is all over the media. But is the sheer volume of sexual images harming our children? Or is it something else?

A recent movie, “A Guy Thing,” begins with a bachelor (played by Jason Lee) hurrying a woman (Julia Stiles) out of bed after a drunken one-night stand.

The scene is typical of how casual sex is portrayed on television and in the movies.

14-year-old Katie Seewald says, “Every TV show now has like at least one character who is like a slut.”

A study by the Rand Corporation finds that teens who watch shows with heavy sexual content are twice as likely to get pregnant or get someone pregnant compared to kids who don’t watch those shows. Still, while the study demonstrates a correlation between teenage sexual behavior and television content, it does not prove a cause. Are the higher pregnancy rates the result of TV viewing, or is it simply that kids who take sexual risks and end up pregnant are more likely to watch sexual content on TV? It is not clear.

Experts say one problem with television content is that sex seldom has consequences.

“If they see sex without negative consequences…they may think that having, or engaging in sex, may not have negative consequences,” explains Dr. Gina Wingood, Associate Professor at Emory University.

Bo Brewer, 17, agrees, “You never see abortion in movies or on t-v.”

So does 17-year-old Elizabeth Green, “They want everything to be in the heat of the moment, to flow, and having to stop to go put on a condom doesn’t really flow with the storyline.”

The experts’ advice?

Limit the amount of sexual content your kids are allowed to watch and talk with your children about the sexy scenes they see on TV.

Studies show children are much less likely to be influenced by what they see if they know their parents strongly disagree.

“Teens and young people do care what their parents think. And they do care what their parents’ feelings are,” says psychologist Betsy Gard. “And if a parent expresses very strong dislike of a program and explains their reasons, that’s going to have an impact on the teen.”

“And I think it’s kind of up to parents or some figure like that to say ‘well that’s not the way it is, that’s just the way that it is on that t-v show,” says 16-year-old Mary Cloud.

Tips for Parents

The American Academy of Pediatrics has suggested that portrayals of sex on entertainment television may contribute to precocious adolescent sex. Approximately two-thirds of television programs contain sexual content, and adolescents who viewed more sexual content were more likely to initiate intercourse and progress to more advanced non-coital sexual activities. Youths in the top 10th percentile of television sex viewing were twice as likely to have sex as those youths who were in the bottom 10th percentile of viewing.

Adolescence is a key period of sexual exploration and development. This is the time when teens begin to consider which sexual behaviors are enjoyable, moral and appropriate for their age group. Many teens become sexually active during this period; currently, 46 percent of high school students in the United States admit to having had sexual intercourse. Consider the following:

By ninth grade, 34 percent of teens have had sexual intercourse. By 12th grade, this figure increases to 60 percent.

On average, teens watch three hours of television every day.

Watching a program that talked about sex was associated with the same risks as exposure to a program that depicted sexual behavior.

Approximately one in seven television programs includes a portrayal of sexual intercourse.

Television programs with sexual content have an average of 4.4 scenes per hour containing sexually related material.

Youths who watched more depictions of sexual risks or safety were less likely to initiate intercourse.
Watching sex on television predicts and may hasten adolescent sexual initiation. Reducing the amount of sexual content in entertainment programming, reducing adolescent exposure to this content, or increasing references to and depictions of the possible negative consequences of sexual activity could delay when teens embark on sexual activities. A quarter of all sexually active teens will contract a sexually transmitted disease each year. According to 57 percent of adults and 72 percent of teens, the media has given "more attention" to teen pregnancy prevention in recent years.

Remember that as a parent you may be able to reduce the effects of sexual content in the media by watching television with your teenagers and discussing your own beliefs about sex and the behaviors being portrayed. Most parents say they have discussed sex with their teenagers, but far fewer teenagers say they had such talks with their parents. Sixty-nine percent of teens report that it would be "much easier" to postpone sexual activity if they could have "more open, honest conversations" about sex with their parents. In addition:

About 60 percent of teens have a television in their bedroom. The only way to keep parental control of television viewing is to not let your teen have a television in the bedroom.

Unplanned pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases are more common among those who begin sexual activity earlier.

Two-thirds of sexually experienced teens wish they had waited longer to have intercourse.
Seventy-nine percent of teenage virgins are not embarrassed to tell others they have not had sex.
Youngsters who receive little parental supervision may have more time and freedom to watch sexually based programming and more opportunities to engage in sexual activity.

References
The Henry J. Kaiser Family Foundation
Medical News Today
Pediatrics
Rand Corporation
Talk With Your Kids
USA Today

Sue Scheff: Counseloring Cuts Down on Youth Drinking

2008-11-15T05:32:00.001-08:00

Source: Connect with Kids

“If it comes from me, I’m the objective observer. I’m interested in the child, and I try to let them know that. I want what’s best for them, but yet it’s not Mom or Dad saying that.”

– Rhonda Jeffries, M.D., Pediatrician

It’s a troubling fact of life: some kids drink.

“Especially the older they get,” says Dr. Rhonda Jeffries, a pediatrician. “And by senior year, 50 percent or more of kids are drinking. And in fact, by 12th grade, usually 80 percent of the kids have tried alcohol.”

But can a doctor persuade kids not to drink? Kids seem to think so.

“I think coming from somebody besides, maybe, just the parents for some people it will help,” says 18-year-old Andrew Scott, a high school senior.

Lars Thrasher, 17, agrees. “I would think it would be more helpful from a doctor,” he says.

And Christine Terrell, calls doctors advice on drinking and other potentially touchy subjects “extremely beneficial.”

According to a study published in the Annals of Family Medicine, when a physician spends just a few minutes talking to kids about the dangers of alcohol, those kids are 50 percent less likely to drink.

Dr. Jeffries says: “If it comes from me, I’m the objective observer. I’m interested in the child, and I try to let them know that. I want what’s best for them, but yet it’s not Mom or Dad saying that.”

The study reports when kids talked with their doctor, they had 55 percent fewer traffic accidents, 42 percent less emergency room visits and fewer arrests for underage drinking. It seems that when doctors warn kids about alcohol, they listen.

Christine Terrell explains: “They’re not invested in you as their child. They’re invested in you for your health, for your interests, for your sake. And I would definitely listen to a doctor, and I have listened to doctors who have talked to me about subjects like that.”

The study suggests it’s a good idea to ask your doctor to talk with your children about alcohol. Of course, experts add, parents should bring up the subject as well. “They need to be open to discussion and to bringing these issues up with their kids,” says Dr. Jeffries. “And I think that parents who are in touch with their kids and connected to them are really helpful in getting their children though adolescence without negative effects.”

LaShauna Pellman, 17, sums it up best. “If my parents tell me something,” she says, “then I listen to them even more.”

Tips for Parents

Alcohol-related fatalities are a leading cause of death among young adults in the United States. In the United States, 70.8 percent of all deaths among persons aged 10 to 24 result from only four causes – motor-vehicle crashes, other unintentional injuries, homicide and suicide.

Should your family doctor take just a few moments to counsel your child about the risks of alcohol, there is great potential for positive outcome. Just a few minutes of a doctor's counseling helped young adults reduce their high-risk drinking and the number of traffic crashes, emergency room visits, and arrests for substance or liquor violations, says a study in the Annals of Family Medicine. Consider the following:

Underage drinking causes over $53 billion in criminal, social and health problems.
Alcohol is a leading factor in the three leading causes of death for 15- to 24-year-olds: automobile crashes, homicide and suicide.

Primary-care doctors should make it a priority to counsel young adults about high-risk drinking. Young adults, ages 18 to 30, who received counseling about reducing their use of alcohol:

Experienced a 40 to 50 percent decrease in alcohol use.
Reported 42 percent fewer visits to the emergency room.
Were involved in 55 percent fewer motor vehicle crashes.

The ways a parent can influence his or her teen’s drinking habits is complex. A universal method regarding what works best in preventing underage drinking may not exist. A study published in the Journal of Adolescent Health found that a parent’s attitude toward drinking influences a child's behavior in various ways. One controversial finding was that teens who drank with their parents were less likely than others to have binged or used alcohol at all in recent weeks. Others, of course, argue passionately that parents who drink with their underage children are not only breaking the law but encouraging dangerous behavior that can lead to life-long consequences.

The Journal study also found that strict parenting can curb kids' drinking. Teens who said they feared they would have their privileges taken away if they got caught drinking were half as likely to drink as those who thought their parents would not punish them. In addition, consider the following:

The average girl takes her first sip of alcohol at age 13. The average boy takes his first sip of alcohol at age 11.

Teenagers who said their parents or their friends' parents had provided alcohol for a party during the past year were twice as likely as their peers to have used alcohol or binged during the previous month.

Nearly 75 percent of teens surveyed said they had never used alcohol.
About 25 percent of t

eens in the study said they'd been at party in the past year where parents supplied alcohol.
Fourteen percent of teens surveyed said they were with their parents the last time they drank.

References
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC)
Focus Adolescent Services
Health Day
National Youth Violence Prevention Center
Reuters
U.S. Department of Health and Human Services
University of California, Irvine

Parents Universal Resource Experts - Sue Scheff - PE4Life

2008-11-09T11:50:00.000-08:00

Wow - what a great website I was just introduced to! Check out this page for Parent Information:

Parents are busy with a full workday, helping their children with homework, engaging their children in after school activities, and so on. This doesn't leave a whole lot of time for physical activity in your own lives. Do you realize that schools have devalued and cut physical education to the point that the majority of children get one day of PE per week? Children today have a shorter life expectancy than their parents for the first time in one hundred years because of the epidemic of obesity, according to Dr. William Klish, Professor of Pediatrics and Head of Pediatric Gastroenterology at Baylor College of Medicine. Lack of PE at school is a disservice to your child's health. Speak up. Demand that your school offers daily quality physical education. Use PE4life as a resource partner to enhance your school's PE program. A recent study revealed that 81% of teachers and 85% of parents favor requiring students to take physical education every day at every grade level. As parents, you can rally people in your community to get involved by ordering a PE4life Community Action kit video and show it to the PTA, the school board and other community groups. The next step is to invite PE4life to make a presentation to your school leaders, bring a team of people to train at a PE4life Academy, or invite PE4life to do an in-service for your school staff. As your resource partner, PE4life can provide these and many other services to your school as you work to get children more active and healthy.

Click here for more: http://www.pe4life.org/Parents/index.cfm?section=2

Sue Scheff: ADHD Parenting Tips

2008-10-31T04:47:00.000-07:00

Source: ADDitude Magazine

ADHD Parenting Tips: Be Positive and Calm

What does my style of parenting look like? Let’s say your nine-year-old refuses to comply with a simple request, like “Please pick up your toys.” Don’t repeat your request. Don’t yell or threaten a time-out. Instead, respond with action — firm, calm, quiet, and dramatic.

For instance, you might begin placing the toys into a container. If the child asks what you’re doing, you can say that the toys will remain in your possession until she pays you a small sum or performs certain chores. Your floor will be free of clutter — and your child will be more likely to comply next time.

Read entire article: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/1879.html

Sue Scheff - Cyberbullying

2008-10-23T09:51:00.000-07:00

Source: Connect with Kids

“I’d block them, but then they’d have another screen name and they’d be like ‘you’re a whore, you can’t get away from this’… It would just bring me to tears and I would cry because I couldn’t get away from it as much as I tried.”

– Erica Bryant, 18 years old

Everyday at school, Erica Bryant was harassed. “They’d call me a slut, call me a whore.”

The bullying became too much, so her parents decided to have her home schooled.

“So, sure, a huge part of the problem was resolved in that she didn’t have to face that trauma everyday, she didn’t have to sit in the lunchroom by herself,” explains her mom, Linda Perloff, “but what we didn’t expect was the power of the Internet …we didn’t expect the instant messaging.”

Erica explains her frustration: “I’d block them, but then they’d have another screen name and they’d be like ‘you’re a whore, you can’t get away from this. It would just bring me to tears and I would cry because I couldn’t get away from it, as much as I tried.”

Experts say cyber bullying can be even more painful and pervasive than face-to-face harassment.

“You can never really get away from it,” explains pediatrician Dr. Ken Haller, “because even if you’re not on the Internet checking out what people are saying about you, other people are.”

But, experts say, there are ways to minimize attacks online.

First, make sure your child doesn’t post anything revealing.

“If they’re thinking, I’m just putting this out there for my friends to read, they don’t realize that anyone can pick this up and someone who might be a potential bully would say, ‘Ah! I’m going to use this. This is great’,” says Haller.

Experts say if the cyber bullying doesn’t stop- print the messages out and show them to the bully’s parents. If the messages are threatening, go to the police.

“I always encourage parents to talk to your local law enforcement agency and run it by them,” says Judy Freeman, a school social worker. “Many times they say, ‘well, we really can’t do anything,’ but if it’s - if it borders onto harassment or if there’s some threat involved, they will become involved.”

Erica is now in a new school. The harassment has stopped- at least for her.

“If I see it happen to other girls I’m not going to sit by and watch,” she says. “I’m going to get involved and put an end to it.”

Tips for Parents

Bullying in America has become an epidemic. In fact, with the advent of the Internet, bullies don’t even have to have physical contact with your child to torment him/her. Thus, parents are faced with the monumental task of monitoring the activities of children in a world of virtually unlimited sources of information. Although many parents attempt to regulate the access of their children to the Internet, that access is, in fact, nearly ubiquitous. Consider these facts regarding children, technology and the Internet:

Children are increasingly using new technologies in school, at the library, at home and in after-school activities.

A recent study estimated that nearly 10 million children are online.

Over one quarter of U.S. classrooms have Internet access, and 78 percent of schools have some kind of access to the Internet.

Two out of three public libraries provide computers and Internet access for public use.

Because bullying – including online bullying – can be such an emotional issue, experts say it is extremely important to open the lines of communication with your kids. This can include …

Starting to talk with them early.
Initiating conversations.
Creating an open environment.
Communicating your values.
Listening to your child.
Trying to be honest.
Being patient.
Sharing your experiences.

Also, watch for behavioral changes. Children who are suffering from teasing and bullying may try to hide the hurt. They become withdrawn from family and friends, lose interest in hobbies, and may turn to destructive habits like alcohol, drugs, and acts of violence.

While bullying, harassment and teasing are unfortunate aspects of childhood, you can help minimize these occurrences by raising non-violent children. The American Academy of Pediatrics cites the following tips for curbing hurtful behavior in your child:

Give your child consistent love and attention. Every child needs a strong, loving relationship with a parent or other adult to feel safe and secure and to develop a sense of trust. Without a steady bond to a caring adult, a child is at risk for becoming hostile, difficult and hard to manage.

Make sure your child is supervised. A child depends on his or her parents and family members for encouragement, protection and support as he or she learns to think for him or herself.

Without proper supervision, your child will not receive the guidance he or she needs. Studies report that unsupervised children often have behavior problems.

Monitor your child’s Internet use. If your child knows you are watching, he/she is less likely to take part in cyber-bullying. Also, encourage him/her to avoid using chat rooms with violent or derogatory conversations.
Show your child appropriate behaviors by the way you act. Children often learn by example. The behavior, values and attitudes of parents and siblings have a strong influence on them. Be firm with your child about the possible dangers of violent behavior and language. Also, remember to praise your child when he or she solves problems constructively without violence.

Be consistent about rules and discipline. When you make a rule, stick to it. Your child needs structure with clear expectations for his or her behavior. Setting rules and then not enforcing them is confusing and sets up your child to “see what he or she can get away with.”

Try to keep your child from seeing violence in the home or community. Violence in the home can be frightening and harmful to children. A child who has seen violence at home does not always become violent, but he or she may be more likely to try to resolve conflicts with violence.

Try to keep your child from seeing too much violence in the media. Watching a lot of violence on television, in the movies and in video games can lead children to behave aggressively. As a parent, you can control the amount of violence your child sees in the media by limiting television viewing and previewing games, movies, etc., before allowing access to them by your child.

Help your child stand up against violence. Support your child in standing up against violence. Teach him or her to respond with calm but firm words when others insult or threaten another person. Help your child understand that it takes more courage and leadership to resist violence than to go along with it.

References
Kaiser Family Foundation
Talking With Your Kids
British Medical Journal
American Academy of Pediatrics
University of California- Los Angeles

Sue Scheff: ADHD School Behavior

2008-10-13T12:06:00.000-07:00

How teachers and parents can inspire better ADHD school behavior with help from these impulse-controlling exercises for children with attention-deficit.

by ADDitude Editors

The problem: The student with attention deficit disorder (ADD ADHD) interrupts the teacher and classmates by calling out answers or commenting while others are speaking.

The reason: Children with ADHD have difficulty controlling their impulses. Scientists believe that a problem with dopamine, a brain chemical, causes them to respond immediately and reflexively to their environment — whether the stimulus is a question, an idea, or a treat. That’s why they often seem to act or talk before thinking, and ADHD school behavior suffers as a result.

The obstacles: Children with ADHD may not be aware that they are interrupting. Even if they are, they have difficulty understanding that their behavior is disturbing or disruptive to others.Simply telling them their behavior is wrong doesn’t help. Even though they know this, their impulsivity overrides their self-control. Many ADHD children can’t understand nonverbal reprimands, like frowning, either.

Read entire article here: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/1977.html

Kids Not Prepared for College

2008-10-03T08:26:00.000-07:00

Source: Connect with Kids

“We found that when students take those upper-level courses, beyond Algebra Two... it greatly increased their chances of being ready for college.”

– Jon Erickson, ACT Educational Services

Twins Lauren and Stefanie Milligan are college freshman. Both of them say their high school wasn’t all that demanding.

Lauren says: “I saw teachers who lacked willingness to really be there. Teachers who I thought didn’t really seem to care about preparing their students.” And she notes, “I didn’t see a lot of incentives in my school for students to be academically motivated. We didn’t really get any kind of rewards or anything like that for being motivated.”

Stefanie had a similar experience. “Most of my friends,” she says, “were in what was called on-level classes. And the on-level classes were not intense. (They) did not require much effort at all … didn’t require attendance, even.”

That leaves many experts wondering … are high school kids prepared for college?

Jon Erickson, vice president of educational services for ACT, which administers the annual college entrance exam, explains, “If students aren’t ready for college, especially as measured by the college readiness benchmarks, their odds of either not getting into college, of going into remediation or not doing well once in college or of not graduating are greatly increased.“

In fact, according to a study by the public awareness group ‘Strong American Schools,’ more than one-third of college freshman need remedial courses to catch up. And yet, 80 percent had a 3.0 or higher GPA in high school.

Experts say, the way to get ready for college is for high school kids to take the toughest courses they can.

“We found that when students take those upper-level courses beyond Algebra Two… the upper science courses like physics,” says Erickson, “it greatly increased their chances of being ready for college, regardless of how they do in high school.”

And he says parents can play a huge role in motivating their kids. “We find that if they help their students choose their four-year course plan very early in eighth-grade, that’s a great benefit to students.”

Stefanie and Lauren say they were encouraged to take those higher-level courses, and it’s paying off. Both are doing well in their first semester in college as they head into final exams.

“I’ve always been very into my education and wanting to push for success,” says Lauren, “and my parents always placed a big emphasis on my schoolwork.” Stefanie says, “I really feel that I was prepared, that I know what my teachers expect of me.”

Tips for Parents
Even with a diploma in hand, many high school graduates do not have all of the skills necessary to succeed in college-level coursework or workforce training. The “Diploma to Nowhere” study is one of many finding that students aren’t prepared for college. Among the findings in a report from ACT: Only 22 percent of the 1.2 million high school graduates who took the ACT Assessment in 2004 achieved scores that would deem them ready for college in all three basic academic areas — English, math and science.

Among the class of 2004, only 26 percent of ACT-tested high school graduates had scores indicating that they are ready to earn a "C" or higher in their first college biology course, and only 40 percent had scores indicating that they are ready to earn a "C" or higher in their first college algebra course. In addition, results from ACT's assessments for eighth- and 10th-graders have suggested that students who graduate from high school in 2006 and 2008 will be no better prepared for college than this year's graduates.

The ACT Assessment is published and administered by Iowa City-based ACT, formerly American College Testing. Similar to the SAT, the test measures college aptitude.
“The fact is, American high school students are not ready for college, and they’re not ready for work,” said Cynthia B. Schmeiser, ACT’s vice president for development.
Seventy-eight percent of students who took the ACT were not prepared for college-level biology, algebra or English-composition classes.
Eighth-, ninth-, and 10th-graders fared just as poorly on ACT-sponsored tests of their college readiness as 2004 graduates.
Of these younger students only 12 percent were prepared for postsecondary lessons in biology, 34 percent for algebra and 63 percent for English composition.
Curriculum changes may not bring quick results.
“When American public schools do not ensure students receive a quality education, they fail in their mission and in their obligation to taxpayers," says Strong American Schools Chairman Roy Romer. "Our country cannot afford a high school diploma that does not show real student achievement."

The ACT’s report “urges schools to strengthen the high school core curriculum to help improve students' readiness for college and the workforce. Students in K-8 who are not learning the foundational skills for rigorous high school coursework should be identified earlier and provided with supportive interventions, thus preparing them for higher-level math and science courses such as trigonometry, pre-calculus, chemistry and physics.

To increase the number of students ready for college and work, ACT is launching "Ready to Succeed," a national demonstration project that will focus on course quality and rigor. Selected school districts will work with a team of specialists to evaluate the rigor of their courses, to provide the resources and training necessary to improve them, and to measure improvements in student achievement.

Recent research indicates that the skills required for workforce training beyond high school are the same as those expected of a first-year college student.
Students at all levels of achievement can benefit from taking rigorous courses.
Too few high school students enroll in challenging classes, and the quality of those courses, which may look rigorous on paper, varies greatly by school.
The traditional core high school curriculum of four years of English and three years of mathematics and science may not be sufficient for students to be prepared for college. Students who took more than that minimum were far more likely to succeed in college, the study found.
References
ACT, Inc.
Education Week
Simple Things You Can Do To Help All Children Read Well
Strong American Schools

Sue Scheff: Aniexty Disorders

2008-09-27T09:48:00.000-07:00

Source: Connect with Kids

“Instead of looking at the whole picture, I’ll be looking at the dots and lines in a picture.”

– Courtney, 17 years old

Seventeen-year-old Courtney is obsessed with saving. She saves everything—even hair. She even saves hair from her brush or off of her shirt.

Daye Blackmon, Courtney’s mother, says she saved “hair that she may find on her shirt, in her brush—she saved it at the foot of her bed.”

Courtney eventually examines each piece of hair. Daye says that “in Courtney’s mind” there may be something important on the hair that Courtney didn’t want to throw away.

Courtney suffers from a severe case of obsessive-compulsive disorder, or OCD. It started when she was 13.

At the root of it is extreme anxiety.

But she’s found an unusual way to cope. Courtney narrates everything she does. She checks behind herself every time she leaves a room, a ritual is so intrusive that it once took her more than two hours to walk up the stairs to her bedroom.

Her mom says, “It seems like everything she does is a ritual.”

Experts say, not every child with anxiety or obsessive behaviors will be diagnosed with O-C-D. But the sooner you can get treatment, the less likely it will develop into something worse.

Dr. John Piacentini, clinical child psychologist, explains, “Many of these kids don’t grow out of it, they won’t grow out of it, and so kind of ignoring it or thinking that it’s not a problem can really lead to more severe problems down the road.”

For those, like Courtney, behavior therapy and medication can help.

And, experts say, parents can help kids through anxious moments and obsessive behavior by showing them positive ways of coping.

“I think you’re actually trying to teach your child to be flexible. Give them different different options—even if that’s different rituals—just so they’re not always stuck with one coping mechanism,” says Dr. Vincent Ho, child psychiatrist.

Courtney’s behavior therapy and medication have helped a lot, but her mom says that she still has a long way to go.

Tips for Parents

Anxiety disorders are the most common mental health problems that occur in children and adolescents. According to one large-scale study of 9 to 17 year olds, entitled Methods for the Epidemiology of Child and Adolescent Mental Disorders (MECA), as many as 13 percent of young people had an anxiety disorder in a year. Types of anxiety disorders include:

Generalized Anxiety Disorder: symptoms include exaggerated worry and tension over everyday events.
Panic Disorder: characterized by feelings of extreme fear and dread that strike unexpectedly and repeatedly for no apparent reason, often accompanied by intense physical symptoms, such as chest pain, pounding heart, shortness of breath, dizziness, or abdominal distress.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD): a condition that can occur after exposure to a terrifying event, most often characterized by the repeated re-experience of the ordeal in the form of frightening, intrusive memories, and brings on hypervigilance and deadening of normal emotions.

Phobias: social phobia, extreme fear of embarrassment or being scrutinized; specific phobia, excessive fear of an object or situation, such as dogs, heights, loud sounds, flying, costumed characters, enclosed spaces, etc.
Separation anxiety disorder - excessive anxiety concerning separation from the home or from those to whom the person is most attached

Selective mutism - persistent failure to speak in specific social situations.

One of the most debilitating of the anxiety disorders is obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). OCD is a type of disorder in which time-consuming obsessions and compulsions significantly interfere with a person’s routine, making it difficult to work or to have a normal social life or relationships. OCD can strike at any age but often begins in adolescence or early adulthood. Afflicting nearly 4 million Americans, OCD is equally common in men and women and knows no geographic, ethnic, or economic boundaries. Generally, OCD is characterized by two components:

Obsessions - constant, intrusive, unwanted thoughts that cause distressing emotions such as anxiety or disgust. Children experiencing obsessions recognize that these persistent images are a product of their own mind and are excessive or unreasonable. Yet, these intrusive thoughts cannot be settled by logic or reasoning. For example, some people may constantly fear bringing harm or injury to themselves or others or worry excessively about germs and contamination.

Compulsions - urges to do something to lessen discomfort, usually discomfort that is caused by an obsession. Rituals are the behaviors in which children engage in response to a compulsion. In the most severe cases, a constant repetition of rituals may fill the day, making a normal routine impossible. Compounding the anguish these rituals cause is the knowledge that the compulsions are irrational. Examples of compulsions include:

Cleaning - Provoked by the fear that real or imagined germs, dirt, or chemicals will "contaminate" them, some spend hours and hours washing themselves or cleaning their surroundings.

Repeating - To dispel anxiety, some utter a name, phrase, or behavior several times. They know these repetitions won’t actually guard against injury but fear harm will occur if they don’t do it.

Completing - People with this compulsion must perform a series of complicated behaviors in an exact order or repeat them again and again until they are done perfectly.

Checking - The fear of harming oneself or others by forgetting to lock the door or close the window develops into the ritual of checking.

Being meticulous - While neatness and tidiness don’t signify a disorder, some individuals with OCD develop an overwhelming concern about where things go on a desk or the appearance of a room.
Avoiding - Compulsive avoiders stay away from the cause of their anxiety and anything related to it.

Hoarding - One of the less common compulsions, hoarding involves the constant collection of useless items.
People with this compulsion may collect anything - scraps, newspapers, clothing, containers, cans, stones, even garbage - to the point that rooms are filled, doorways are blocked, and health hazards develop.

Slowness - Also a rather uncommon compulsion that strikes mostly men, this compulsion causes people to do certain tasks very, very slowly.

Other varieties of compulsions include excessive and ritualized praying, counting, and list making.
OCD is not a curable illness, however it can be treated and controlled. Ironically, some of the biggest impediments to the successful treatment of OCD are related to the nature of the illness itself, as well as parental and child perceptions of the effects of the illness. Children and adolescent may feel shame for doing/thinking such bizarre things, coupled with a fear of being considered "weird", "strange" or crazy. The generally secretive nature of the disease, lack of knowledge about OCD, and a fear of medication and/or other types of therapy also serve as to negatively effect treatment of OCD. Without treatment, the prognosis for OCD is not good. The disorder waxes and wanes, but left untreated the OCD will continue indefinitely. Generally only about 10-20% of OCD sufferers have a spontaneous remission of symptoms without some kind of treatment.

With treatment, the prognosis for OCD is very good. Up to 80% of OCD sufferers improve significantly with proper treatment of behavioral therapy and medication. The two most effective treatments for OCD are drug therapy and behavior therapy.

Currently, the most effective medications for OCD are the SSRI's (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors). These medications have brand names such as Prozac, Paxil, Luvox, and Zoloft as well as the tricyclic Anafranil. These are the only medications proven effective for OCD thus far. Other medications may be added to improve the effect of the SSRI’s. These medications can result in a 40-95% decrease in symptoms if taken properly.

The primary types of behavior therapy used for OCD treatment are exposure and response prevention. While this therapy can initially be anxiety provoking in and of itself, it is the best method of permanently reducing obsessions and compulsions.

Ultimately, the most effective treatment for OCD is a combination of pharmacological and behavioral therapies.

References
National Institute of Mental Health
American Psychiatric Association
Obsessive Compulsive and Spectrum Disorders Association

Sue Scheff: Preventing Addiction by John C. Fleming

2008-09-20T07:45:00.001-07:00

How can concerned parents predict if their kids will become addicted to drugs or alcohol? With the effect of media and the current wide availability of addicting drugs, parents face more challenges raising children than ever before. Opinions vary on the question of who will become addicted. Some think that people become addicted because of their heredity, while others think addiction is not a disease at all, just a weakness of will.

Visit http://www.johncfleming.com/ for more information.

Sue Scheff: Teens and Steroids

2008-09-15T15:12:00.000-07:00

Don’t Be An Asterisk. Whether it is a potential college scholarship or just helping the team win, some teens feel pressure to do whatever it takes to get an “edge”, even if it means taking steroids or other illegal substances.Hopefully the striking video and information available on the official website (link below) will educate teens and their families about performance enhancing drugs.

Check out the 30 second PSA video here:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uJ-DaJvBKuc

For more information on the campaign visit:http://www.dontbeanasterisk.com/

I just received this educational information for parents to be aware of - be sure to take a minute to visit this website and a minute to watch the video. Being an educated parents helps you to help your teen!

Sue Scheff: Teen Body Image

2008-09-12T08:00:00.000-07:00

As school is open throughout our country, teens all over will have to confront peer pressure and in many instances, it involves their body image. Do they fit in? Are they too heavy? Too thin? Parents need to be aware of their kids and how they are feeling about themselves both emotionally and psychically to help prevent peer pressure from controlling their teen's behavior.

Body Image in Teens by Sarah Maria

If you're in high school, most of your friends are probably on a diet. A recent study shows that 90% of junior and senior girls are on a diet regularly, even though only 10-15% are actually overweight.

The modeling industry also promotes the idea that you need to diet and exercise religiously. Fashion models are actually thinner than 98% of American women. An average woman stands 5'4" tall and weighs about 140 lbs, while the average fashion model is a towering 5'11" tall and weighs under 117 lbs.

In reality no amount of dieting, exercise and discipline can earn you a magazine cover-ready body because those photos have been Photo Shopped, doctored and airbrushed. Don't waste your time attempting to be what you are not, instead; focus on cultivating who you are!
Body Image TipsAs you progress through puberty and your high school years, your body changes as fast as your favorite ringtones. But learning to appreciate your body and have positive self image is a task that few adults have even mastered. Here are some tips to help you learn to love yourself:

Read entire article here: http://www.breakfreebeauty.com/teens.php

Sue Scheff presents: Becoming a part of your government and getting your teen involved

2008-09-04T04:54:00.000-07:00

America may be the world’s most powerful democracy, but even the strongest democratic government only succeeds because of the participation of its citizens. However, the voting participation percentages of Americans are some of the worst in the world for major modern democracies. Due to this alarming fact, one of the most pressing responsibilities of good citizens is participation in the democratic process.

If you wish to become a productive citizen, Democratic participation does not end with simply voting, one must influence others to participate as well. There are many ways to get fellow community members out to the polls to vote. Luckily, the act of voting is one of the best ways to get others to vote. Leading by action is an important tool for good citizens, because we all know actions speak much louder than words.

You can also put an “I voted” sticker on your car or even offer to drive someone to a polling place to promote community voting participation. Simply sharing your knowledge about candidates, as well as times or places to vote will influence greater participation in those around you. Use this poll locator to find polling places around your area and be sure to share that knowledge.

An extremely important part of the democratic system is manning the polling places themselves. The importance of this job is extremely underrated and overlooked, but its Democratic necessity is undeniable. The poll workers help maintain the ability for everyone to have an honest and fair place to vote, which is the basic foundation of our political process. Anyone can volunteer to work at a polling place and be a part of the American political system. Working at a polling place puts you on the front lines of the government system, allowing you to become the gate keeper to American Democracy. Working at a local polling area is a classic example of productive citizenship.

Another classic and positive good citizen practice is writing letters to your regional congressional representative when you feel import issues require their attention. Often people have problems in their community but do nothing, when even one letter sent to a state or regional representative can solve the problem or at least bring attention to your community needs. A good citizen becomes a spokesperson for their community, and when problems arise they can lead the charge to solve them. Writing these letters shows other people that you are taking an active role in the government process, and this action is what good citizens stand for.
City council meetings are another great way to become involved in your community. Any member of the community can attend these meetings and have their voice heard by the local government. You can go and say whatever you want and the local government must to listen to your words.

One very simple and small key to good democratic citizenship may at first seem insignificant, but actually provides the foundation for all future political processes. When at dinner, bring up political issues and facilitate family discussions on important political matters. This will get your kids thinking about politics, so they may be more likely to talk about it a school, which will spread this idea of civic thought to other kids. Putting your family in an active and citizenship oriented mindset creates important building blocks to good citizenship because you are ensuring the growth of healthy democratic thought and deliberation to younger generations. Passing political knowledge and good citizen habits down to your children ensures that your legacy as a good citizen continues well into the future.

Learn More - Click Here.

Parents Universal Resource Experts - Sue Scheff - High School Transition

2008-08-29T06:50:00.000-07:00

At this time of the year, as schools throughout our country are opening, for those teens that are transitioning into High School can be a challenging time. Connect with Kids weekly article on High School Transition offers parents and teens tips on helping make this change go smoothly.

Source: Connect with Kids

“(My sons are) scared and you’re nervous and you want to fit in. And hopefully they’ll come home and talk about it. And I know Kyle was worried about getting beaten up…and that’s the first time he’s mentioned that.”

– Carrie Bickwit, mother

Kyle and grant have spent the summer playing,

But now high school is just a few days away.

“As it gets closer it gets more… it hits me more that it’s that close,” says Kyle, 13.

“I’m a little nervous about all the homework,” admits twin brother Grant, “Everyone’s saying about how it’s going to be twice as much as middle school.”

Kyle worries about fitting in…

“I’m kind of shy,” he says, “And if you’re in with people you don’t really know, you’re afraid you’ll make a mistake and that’ll ruin you.”

Psychologist Nancy McGarrah, Ph.D., says there are plenty of kids who share Kyle and Grant’s concerns. “I hear a lot of headaches and stomach aches this time of year, because they are so anxious about going to school,” she says.

To help a child gear up academically, experts recommend a little extra reading the last several days before school begins.

“We’re actually doing a pre-reading book report and right now it’s taking a while ‘cause it’s summer and my brain’s off,” says Grant.

For a child worried about fitting in…experts suggest find a friend with an older son or daughter who’s been through it all…

“To tell them that this is going to be short lived,” says Dr. McGarrah, “This is going to be somewhat painful but it’s something you adjust to pretty quickly.”

Next, as soon as school starts, join a club, or activity- any small group where you can make friends.

“In a big school it’s even more important, because you really can feel lost in the crowd.”

Finally, whatever their fears or anxieties…

“I think it’s important to reassure them,” says Dr. McGarrah, “To tell them first of all that all kids feel that way. Even the kid that you look at as the most successful, attractive kid is probably feeling that way.”

Tips for Parents
Ninth grade is a time of great change in many students’ lives. They are either the “big men on campus” or else they are on the bottom of the totem pole. As the debate rages on as to whether ninth graders should be in middle or high school, experts have developed advantages and disadvantages to keeping ninth graders in the same school with the sixth, seventh and eight grades.

Advantages:

Ninth graders can have a leadership role that they would not enjoy in a senior high school setting.
The difference in age between age 14 (ninth grade) and age 18 (twelfth grade) is so great that it can be difficult for some ninth graders to adjust.
Some ninth graders are too young and immature to be placed with senior high school students.
The four-year stay in one school facilitates better relationships for students, staff and parents than a shorter stay.
Disadvantages:

Ninth graders are more like tenth, eleventh and twelfth graders because most have gone through puberty.
Separating ninth graders from tenth, eleventh and twelfth graders limits curriculum and extracurricular offerings for them.
The younger children, especially the sixth graders, may want to imitate the ninth graders and grow up too fast.
Ninth graders will experience a variety of new skills and milestones. It is always good for parents to have some idea of what their student is going through, and the following list should help.

Intellectual Skills – Higher expectations coincide with his/her own increasing abilities. He/she will have interests that span farther and wider than ever, in addition to a greater awareness and curiosity about the world around him/her. An example of your teenager’s expanding intellect is his/her newfound skill of deductive reasoning.
Social Skills – Your adolescent is becoming less egocentric in his/her views, and that gives a greater ability to compromise, to stay composed when he/she’s in disagreement with someone and to be generally more tolerant and even-tempered. His/her view of the world will settle first on the friends he/she has around him/her.
Emotional changes – While your ninth-grader is less self-conscious than he/she has been in the past couple of years, he/she is most likely still uncertain about how he/she measures up. Physical appearance matters greatly to him/her, as well as how they’re developing.
Challenges – Your student will encounter many challenges throughout the ninth grade year, and the most common ones are academic failure, eating too much or too little, struggling with abstinence versus teenage sex and adjusting to a bigger school.

References
U.S. Department of Education
Family Education Network
Parent Soup
Partnership for a Drug Free America

Sue Scheff: STRUGGLING TEENS? Looking for Help? Tips for Parents by Sue Scheff

2008-08-27T06:08:00.000-07:00

Tips for Parents on Surfing the Internet for Teen Help Schools and Programs - Do you Need an Educational Consultant?

Internet Search – Many parents will use Search Engines to type in key words and search terms to describe their child. Unfortunately, in many cases, the parent will see the same group of programs/schools with different titles and descriptions, however leading back to the same organization. Parents that are not familiar with this industry can easily be misinformed. An example is a key word such as Military Schools. Are you aware that reputable Military Schools are not for at risk children? Please review http://www.helpyourteens.com/military_schools_and_academies.html.

The term Spamdexing has been used when organizations will purchase many websites and URL’s all leading back to the same group. The vast number of key words and search terms, no matter what the issues, may all be filtered back to the same group. This can be very deceiving and detrimental when searching for the best placement for your child.This can be a farce and totally an attack on desperate parents seeking help. Some of the websites are owned by “parents” that actually gain free tuition by you enrolling from their website. Even though “full disclosure” is required, it is sometimes missing. In reading a site recently parent’s claimed a program had saved their twins lives. However the story read that the children are still in the program. If the children are still in the program, how do you know if it saved a life yet? They don’t, but they do gain a free tuition from if you enroll from their website ID number. With twins in a program, this must be costly.

Sponsored listings are sold to the highest bidders. It seems only businesses with large marketing budgets can afford to be seen in top spots. This causes many very good and qualified programs and schools never to be seen. Many, including Computer Consultants, frown upon this tactic and Internet Professionals that feel it is causing unfair solicitation. Unfortunately this is part of marketing and public relations, which can leave out the small people.

Are you looking at websites that offer a Clearing House of Schools and Programs? Or offer to sell you a book? Do you think you are getting a qualified school and/or program since it is listed in the book? Did you know most times it is paid advertising?

So whom do you trust? It is very scary in this industry of children needing intervention. That is one of our main goals; to recognize who is qualified and who is not. We are not a clearing-house for programs; we do not have a large number of schools and programs that we have researched yet. We try to give parents a peace of mind with the programs we have researched and personally visited. No matter how much trouble your child may be causing, they are human and deserve to be in a safe and qualified environment. These programs that urge you to act now are not taking the time to fully evaluate what is needed for your child. They seem to assume that every child will fit their program. Please parents, step back from this and think, research and investigate.

Does the Advertising look too good to be true?

Most literature and brochures are made up to be glossy and fancy to advertise as an answer to your troubled child. Some even send tearful DVD’s of parents that claim to have been rescued from their child. When a program needs to use these extreme measures to market and advertise, it is time to investigate and analyze where all the money is being spent. Remember to read the small print and recognize that many of the pictures were not taken at the facilities. Marketing people can also be good sales people. Reaching out to your emotions at a delicate time of your life with your child. For more Helpful Hints in researching please read http://www.helpyourteens.com/helpful_hints.html.

Do you need to hire an Educational Consultant? What about an Independent Educational Consultant? Why are they so much money?

This seems to be a very political group of questions. First, not many can explain their outrageous costs to an already expensive trip. In our research, Educational Consultants do not require a degree and do not need any qualifications. There are not any state or government regulations that they need to comply with. With this, most EC’s are a product of someone that has worked in the field of schools or programs, and there are some that are qualified. The game is figuring out the difference if you need one. We don’t appreciate these games when it involves our children.The Independent Educational Consultants Association (IECA) is a group formed to elaborate their proclaimed profession. They do have certain standards to meet within their own group, however they are not regulated or governed by any State or Governmental Offices. Some are very knowledgeable and quite impressive, however some are extremely self-centered. Most will refer to the same programs time after time. This may not be the best case for your child and family. We have found that there are many politics that mandate their decisions into the same programs and schools time after time. With families that we have spoken with that used an EC, tell us their EC has recommended the same school or program as the previous family (most always starting with Wilderness). There seems to be a pattern here; We feel parents should realize just because they are paying a high priced EC, doesn’t mean they are getting the interest for their child in our opinion.

We are not saying that one should not hire an Educational Consultant if they deem it necessary; we are telling parents to do research, investigate and consider your child. In most cases, your therapist can be more beneficial to make a final decision in placement of a child. It can be helpful if the child’s local therapist can participate in helping parents make the most appropriate choice.

For the record, I am not anti-Educational Consultants, I have only witnessed time and time again that parents that used them seem to be lead down the same path, always starting with Wilderness Programs and then moving to a residential therapy program. It is my belief that these teens need consistency - starting and finishing at the same place.

There are non-political Educational Consultants - it is a matter of taking the time to find them, as you have to take time and diligence to locate the best school or program for your individual teen and family.

http://www.helpyourteens.com/
http://www.aparentstruestory.com/

Succeeding in College for ADHD Freshmen - 10 tips to help ADHD college students achieve academic, social and personal success.

2008-08-20T06:42:00.000-07:00

Source: ADDitude Magazine

A car’s poor alignment can lead to resistance and difficulty maintaining a steady course, and the same is true for students. Haven’t you ever struggled with a task that you find boring, only to breeze through a challenging, but more interesting, assignment? When you’re involved with something you enjoy, you’re better able to focus and work becomes easier.

Whether you’re starting college next fall, weighing your options, or are already enrolled, there are several things to keep in mind for a smooth academic ride.

Your interests. Ask yourself, “What do I want to do more than anything else?” The answer should become your road map for choosing a school, a major — even specific courses. You’re more likely to earn good grades in a class you find interesting than in one that puts you to sleep.
How do you handle required classes that you find boring — or overly difficult? Wait a semester before tackling them — one at a time — until you have some experience, and support systems, behind you.

Talk with professors about your learning disability and see if they’re willing to work with you. Free tutoring may be available; if the class is especially difficult, start working with a tutor before you fall behind. If the course is unrelated to your major, you may be able to have it waived.

Of course, you should take your college studies seriously. But there’s no need to sacrifice involvement in sports, clubs, or other extracurricular activities you enjoy. Regular exercise is a great way to work off extra energy, unwind after a stressful day, and, of course, stay in shape. And whether it’s writing for the school paper or playing in the marching band, pursuing your interests will energize you and boost your confidence.

Your environment. Do you thrive in warm weather? Apply to schools in the South. Love the energy of a busy city? Stick with an urban campus.

Consider the size of the schools you look at. You might feel lost in a lecture hall that holds 300 students. In smaller classes, you’ll be drawn to the material, feel like an active participant, and be in a better position to ask for help, should you need it.

Do what you can to make your dorm room feel like home. If you prefer a minimalist look, leave your clutter behind. If you enjoy nature, consider bringing some plants and full-spectrum bulbs or a small indoor fountain. The more attuned you are to your environment, the more energized you’ll feel.

That’s also the case when it comes to studying. If you need quiet to do your best work, find a private room at the library. If you need noise and activity to help you focus, make yourself comfortable at a coffee house near campus.

Your roommates. To get started on the right foot, be totally honest on your roommate questionnaire. Are you messy? Do you stay up until 3 a.m. each night? Admit it. You’re not the only student with these habits, so frankness is your best bet for a good match. Even if you and your roommate don’t end up being best friends, you’ll at least have a shot at a peaceful co-existence. Single rooms are hard to come by, but you may be able to get one as part of your ADHD accommodations.

Seek like-minded friends through university organizations and clubs, whether you’re interested in saving the Earth or starting a corporation.

Your support system. One of the first things you should do after unpacking is to visit the office for students with disabilities. The professionals there understand your needs, and can help you put together an appropriate course schedule (no early morning classes, only one prerequisite class at a time, and so on), identify helpful professors, and put accommodations, such as extra time for exams, into place.

They can also refer you to an ADD coach, who can help you develop a successful study routine and build the organizational skills you’ll need throughout college.

Promoting Community Education

2008-08-18T06:04:00.001-07:00

By Sue Scheff

One of the most important parts of any community is the local school system, and it’s easy for concerned parents and good citizens to become intimately involved in some important aspects of school decisions. Becoming involved with local schools helps decide the direction of the youth in your community, which is of the upmost importance for the success of any community system.

A simple way to begin your citizen school involvement is by attending school board meetings. School board meetings help decide most of the important aspects of a school’s future, including school curriculum, dress code policy, disciplinary measures, budgeting, hiring teachers, new school buildings, and a variety of other things. This is one the best ways to be a part of local school decision making, and if your school board is elected it allows you to vote on school board members while understanding the types of administrative issues that my affecting your kid. At the very least, attending school board meetings provides you with a better understanding of how to be a productive citizen in both the community and school system.

Many schools also seek volunteer help. This work could include anything from grading papers to providing transportation on school field trips. Most public school systems in this country are overcrowded and underfunded, so any volunteer work is looked upon favorably and can help the schools function better. In the end, maintaining the education of our younger generation is always a major part of a good citizen’s workload.

Another great way to get involved in education is organizing after school programs. Many schools have after school programs that they coordinate with volunteers designed to give kids something productive to do after school. Keeping kids out of trouble after school and stimulating them with meaningful work is an excellent way to promote community involvement and healthy learning. Studies show that kids who participate in afterschool programs and extracurricular activities are much more likely to succeed in school then those who don’t.
http://www.helpyourteens.com/

(Sue Scheff) Talking the Talk

2008-08-10T06:01:00.001-07:00

Discussing sex with your tweens and teens can help them make better choices. Here's how.

Temma Ehrenfeld
Newsweek Web Exclusive
Updated: 10:28 AM ET Jul 31, 2008

What kids think about sex might surprise you, but what they're doing sexually—and when they're doing it—might surprise you even more. In a study this year of more than a 1,000 tweens (kids between the ages 11 and 14), commissioned by Liz Claiborne Inc. and loveisrespect.org, nearly half said they'd had a boy- or girlfriend, and one in four said that oral sex or going "all the way" is part of a tween romance. The parents' view? Only 7 percent of parents surveyed in this study think their own child has gone any further than "making out."
The whole subject of sex is so delicate that some parents put off talking to kids about it, believing their child is still too young, or because they're not sure what to say.

They "finally sit down to have the Big Talk," says Dr. Mark Schuster, chief of general pediatrics at Children's Hospital Boston, "and it turns out their teen is already having sex." (The average age of first intercourse in the United States is 16, according to the Centers for Disease Control)The good news is that there's plenty of evidence indicating that kids whose parents do discuss sex with them are more cautious than their peers—more likely to put off sex or use contraception. They also have fewer partners. Coaching for parents helps, as well. Parents who participated in a training program about how to have those difficult conversations, Schuster reports, were six times more likely than a control group to have discussed condoms with their children. So what did the parents learn? Here are nine "talking sex" tips:

1. Find the moment. Instead of saying "it's time to talk about you-know," let the topic arise naturally—say, during a love scene in a video, or while passing a couple on a park bench. It helps to think about opening lines in advance.

2. Don't be vague about your own feelings. You know you don't want your ninth grader getting pregnant, but is oral sex OK? How do you feel about your daughter going steady or dating several boys casually? Consider the messages you want your kids to hear.

3. Anticipate the roadblocks that a teen or tween might set up. If they tend to say "uh huh," try asking open-ended questions or suggesting a variety of possible ways someone might feel in a relevant situation.

4. Be a good listener. Avoid lecturing and don't interrupt once your child opens up. Restate in your own words what you hear and identify feelings.

5. Help your child consider the pros and cons of sexual choices.

6. Relate sex and physical intimacy to love, caring and respect for themselves and their partner.

7. Teach strategies to manage sexual pressure. It may not be obvious to your daughter that she can suggest going to the movies or a restaurant instead of lounging with her boyfriend on a sofa without adult supervision. Or she may not know she can set and stick to a clear rule (such as no touching below the waist). Discuss the fact that "no means no." A simple strategy like getting up and going to the bathroom can give a girl time to regroup.

8. Don't be afraid to get down to specifics. If your teenage daughter or son is spending every afternoon alone with a main squeeze, and you're simply hoping they're using condoms, go ahead and ask whether they are sexually active and using birth control. You can buy a box of condoms and talk about how to use them—practice on a cucumber. A good laugh won't hurt your relationship.

9. Make the conversation ongoing—not a talk that happens once or twice. For more tips on talking to kids about sex and other sensitive issues, visit Children Now, a nonprofit nonpartisan organization's guide to talking to kids of all ages about sexual subjects. Or The American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry's "Facts for Families."

Obesity Top Concern for Kids

2008-08-06T11:13:00.000-07:00

By Connect with Kids

“Do it as a family. Kick them off the couch, get your exercise, stock your house with all kinds of healthy things and try to establish good eating habits, good healthful behaviors.”

– Kathleen Zelman, American Dietetic Association

American kids are getting fatter.

Is it the food they eat? Fifteen-year-old Tony says his diet was definitely unhealthy. “Chips, popcorn, soda, you name it. If it was there, I’d eat it,” he says.

How much they eat? Eighteen-year-old Matt admits he used to go overboard. “I would eat whole bags of potato chips. … We’d have two-liter bottles of soda; I’d drink probably the whole two liters … in a night,” he says.

Is it lack of exercise? “It’s OK if we want to sit at home, and play video games, and eat all day, and do nothing. I mean, our society has kind of put us that way,” says Jonathan, 16.

Or too much stress? Pediatric dietician Marilyn Tanner says, “It’s very common for kids – and adults – to use food as sort of a coping mechanism.”

The answer? It is all of these.

And according to the C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital, for the first time this year, childhood obesity tops the list of concerns parents have for their children.

But how can parents turn the tide?

Kathleen Zelman of the American Dietetic Association says: “Do it as a family. Kick them off the couch, get your exercise, stock your house with all kinds of healthy things and try to establish good eating habits, good healthful behaviors.”

Brenda Johnson, mother of an overweight child agrees. “Then it becomes a part of your lifestyle, and that’s what we’re trying to do. We’re trying to change our lifestyle to not being sedentary, but being active and making better choices,” she says.

It isn’t easy. And television, cars and fast food don’t make it any easier, but making better choices means exercise and a healthy diet.

Fifteen-year-old Tony knows that it takes hard work to shed extra pounds. “I wish, wish, there was some kind of a magic pill you could take, but there isn’t. You just gotta struggle through it,” he says.

Tips for Parents

In the past 30 years, childhood obesity has doubled for children between the ages of 2 and 5 and tripled for 6- to-11-year-olds. More than 15 percent of children between 6 and 19 are considered obese. Countering that trend, child advocates say, will require nothing less than a multi-pronged national effort.

Today, less than 6 percent of high schools require juniors and seniors to take physical education. There is also an "enormous decrease" in the number of school playgrounds. And recess has disappeared in many elementary schools where principals, anxious about preparing students for high-stakes standardized tests, have deemed it "nonproductive."

Efforts are under way to reinstate physical education. Recommendations include a minimum of 150 minutes a week for elementary school students and 225 minutes for high school students.

The Council of Educational Facility Planners International dropped its recommendations calling for vast acreage for large school sites, which will give school districts more flexibility in locating schools on smaller sites in places accessible by walking and biking

By one estimate, 65 percent of students walked to school 30 years ago. Today only 10 percent do.

For more than 14 million children, accounting for 25 percent of students between kindergarten and 12th grade, no parent is home after school. The child must take care of himself or herself. Many receive strict instructions from parents: Lock the door and don't go outside. It's a recipe for inactivity and an opportunity to snack. Only 11 percent of students (6.5 million) attend after-school programs, where they are likely to get a nutritious snack and take part in fitness activities.

The reasons for childhood obesity are complex and cannot be pigeonholed in a single or few causes.

Among the reasons experts cite are:

Kids’ backpacks are too heavy for walking too school.
Children rely on school buses or family vehicles for daily transportation.
Parents are concerned for kids’ safety and no longer permit outside, unsupervised play.
More homework allows less time for play.
Many schools have stopped scheduling recess.
Toy vehicles of today are not kid-powered, but battery-powered.
Computer games stimulate sports, rather than kids actually playing the sport.
Kids often eat due to stress or boredom.

Although cafeteria menus are coming under fire, the problem goes beyond what children eat to include when they eat. Crowded schools must extend lunch hours to serve everyone. An early lunch hour may come when the kids aren't hungry, they may not eat a healthy meal, and then they'll snack later. With a late lunch hour, kids might snack first and not be hungry for a good lunch. Finally, students also have limited time to eat. We're trying to get them to eat healthier food, but that takes time to chew.

References
C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention
The Christian Science Monitor
KidsHealth
WebMD Health

Teenage Acne by Johanna Curtis

2008-08-05T04:16:00.001-07:00

Treating Adult and Teenage Acne

Back acne is some of the hardest acne to get rid of for both teens and adults. Many commercial and prescription products cause adverse side effects and are hard on the pocketbook while providing very little relief from acne. The reason back acne is so difficult is the location of the acne. It usually requires someone assist the person with acne in order to reach and treat it effectively. This can be hard for teens and adults as acne has a stigma of embarrassment that causes low self esteem. Instead, many sufferers of back acne simply wear clothing that covers and avoid situation in which their acne would show.

Dermatologist often prescribe back acne Retin-A, but this can create some pretty nasty side effects that aren’t popular with users. Nature has a different solution and one that works in treating adult acne and teen acne alike. The advantage of natural products for acne is the lack of side effects coupled with a strong record of actually clearing acne for good. They even work on acne cysts, which are the painful and infected acne pustules that are hard to the touch. And, the naturalist remedies do it all without drying your skin, irritating it, or causing a worse outbreak before clearing acne up.

Acne’s worst effect is the scarring by acne cysts and the emotional impact that it leaves behind. Often, in both teens and adults, support is needed so that acne doesn’t become a measure of self worth. Depression and isolation are common for acne sufferers whose acne is more severe. Sadly, our social environment encourages this behavior and feeling since we focus so much on physical appearance. However, acne is not and should never be the measure of anything other than a common skin disorder.

Nature provided everything needed to get rid of acne forever. With lots of positive reinforcement and encouragement from loved ones, even the emotional impact of acne can be erased. Together with support and the gifts of nature, acne can become a distant memory.

Learn more at www.teenage-acne.net

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Teenage Acne Cures by Johanna Curtis

2008-08-01T05:02:00.001-07:00

Acne’s Secret Cure for Adults and Teens

Have you ever wondered just where acne comes from in the first place? One night, you go to sleep, and the next morning you have a fat white zit where your skin used to b e. The thing just seemed to spring up from nowhere. It’s as if there is a prank being played and its target is your skin.

The causes of back acne aren’t any different than the causes of any acne. All acne is created when the subcutaneous oil glands overproduce and clog the hair follicle, which results in a zit. The tiny white bumps are called by many names, but zit is a favorite one. Sometimes, the tiny bump is darker in color and called a blackhead.

Acne doesn’t always stay those little bumps, either. Sometimes, the zit will become a larger pustule that can become pus filled. There is a little tenderness at this stage, but nothing major yet. If the pustule becomes infected, it will become very hard and very painful. At this stage, the zit is actually an acne cyst and can cause scarring if popped. The cyst is actually an indication that there is infection present.

If you’re thinking that only teens can suffer from acne and that you’re safe because you aren’t a teen, then you have fallen victim to a very common myth. Acne has no known verifiable causes other than hereditary and hormonal reasons and no known age limit. Adults and teens can both find themselves treating acne. Clearing adult acne follows the same path as clearing teenage acne. The best course of action is to find and locate a natural, non-irritating solution as this will have the lowest side effects with the longest lasting results. Best of all, natural acne remedies will not cause your skin to become dry nor will they create a situation in which chemicals enter your skin. Your skin is porous and should not come into contact with chemicals if you can help it. Nature created the only secret acne cure needed by man. With its success rate in clearing acne and keeping it gone, it won’t be secret for long.

Visit http://www.teenage-acne.net/ for more information.

Stop Bullying Now! Why do kids bully?

2008-07-29T12:00:00.001-07:00

There are all kinds of reasons why young people bully others, either occasionally or often. Do any of these sound familiar to you?

Because I see others doing it
Because it's what you do if you want to hang out with the right crowd
Because it makes me feel, stronger, smarter, or better than the person I'm bullying
Because it's one of the best ways to keep others from bullying me

Whatever the reason, bullying is something we all need to think about. Whether we've done it ourselves ... or whether friends or other people we know are doing it ... we all need to recognize that bullying has a terrible effect on the lives of young people. It may not be happening to you today, but it could tomorrow. Working together, we can make the lives of young people better.

Learn more at http://www.stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov/index.asp?area=whydoi

On Task On Time for Kids - Daily Routines

2008-07-23T05:18:00.000-07:00

Take the nagging out of parenting!

Find it hard to “Get out the door” on time in the morning? Want to end thosebedtime battles? Want your kids to be more independent?

On·Task On·Time for Kids takes the nagging out of parenting. Designed by a momof triplets plus one, this unique time management system supplies 52 full-color taskstickers to organize three routines: Morning (getting ready for school), Afternoon(transitioning from school to home activities), and Evening (getting ready for bed).Individualized routines are put together by parents and children to fit their life style.

Daily routines are created by applying task stickers to a Routine Disk. The RoutineDisk is inserted onto the On·Task Timer Unit and the child sees what tasks shouldbe completed, what tasks should be done now, and what tasks are coming up next.

Parents don’t need to remind or nag. The words, “Oops, I forgot!” are a thing ofthe past. Turn normally stressful, transition times into self-esteem buildingexperiences. A reward chart is included to acknowledge success and independence.On·Task On·Time for Kids is designed for children between the ages of five andtwelve, and is available with girl or boy illustrations.

Visit http://www.timelymatters.com/ for more information. I recently was made aware of this informational website.

Sue Scheff: Impact of Cyberbullying

2008-07-20T05:37:00.000-07:00

Victims of cyberbullying may experience many of the same effects as children who are bullied in person, such as a drop in grades, low self-esteem, a change in interests or depression. However, cyberbullying can seem more extreme to its victims because of several factors:

Occurs in children’s home. Being bullied at home can take away the place children feel most safe.

Can be harsher. Often kids say things online that they wouldn’t say in person, mainly because they can’t see the other person’s reaction.

Far reaching. Kids can send e-mails making fun of someone to their entire class or school with a few clicks, or post them on a Web site for the whole world to see.

Anonymity. Cyberbullies often hide behind screen names and e-mail addresses that don’t identify who they are. Not knowing who is responsible for bullying messages can add to a victim’s insecurity.

May seem inescapable. It may seem easy to get away from a cyberbully by going offline, but for some kids not going online takes away a major place to socialize.

Source: National Crime Prevention Council.

HIV Complacency

2008-07-17T14:33:00.001-07:00

By Connect with Kids

“The HIV and AIDS education prevention message is not being delivered to youth in a way that motivates them to change behaviors.”

– Edward Gray, Ed.D., commenting on the rise of HIV infection rates among young people

Qaadir has friends who are gay… so does Wesley. But when it comes to HIV, the virus that causes AIDS, many kids don’t seem concerned.

“Most kids my age, they don’t think HIV is a serious problem,” says Wesley, 14.

“There’s medicines for this disease and…for this disease…for that one, and they’re not thinking if they catch this it might be a lifelong thing,” adds 15-year-old Qaadir.

In fact, according to the Centers for Disease Control, after years of decline, the number of AIDS cases among people ages 15 to 24 has risen 15 percent in the last five years.

“It’s a very alarming trend,” says Dr. Edward Gray, professor of counseling.

As medications have allowed people with HIV to live longer, healthier lives, the image kids have of the virus isn’t someone dying, but instead, someone who appearsto be living a healthy, normal life.

“The story now about AIDS is that it’s a trip to the doctor and it’s medication,” says Gray, “Whereas 20 years ago, the story of AIDS was going to funerals.”

Gray says parents need to help their children understand that the AIDS virus is still incurable and deadly, and that those who live with it face a daily struggle.

“Most people don’t want to take needles, and most people don’t want to be regimented that every three hours they’re popping a dozen pills,” says Gray, “I mean people [with AIDS] take cocktails of pills, it’s not just one thing. And just that kind of burden might grab their attention.”

Qaadir agrees. “I mean, you don’t want to wake up every morning and if you cough have to go to the doctor because you might be, you know, ready to pass out from whatever disease.”

Tips for Parents

Recent reports show that nearly half of high school students are or have been sexually active. Unfortunately, with sexual activity comes an increase in Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs). That’s why it is extremely important to talk to your kids about being sexually responsible – before they engage in sex. Consider the following statistics provided by The Alan Guttmacher Institute:

Every year three million sexually active teens – about one-in-four – acquire an STD.
A single act of unprotected sex with an infected partner puts a teenage woman at a one percent risk of acquiring HIV, a 30 percent risk of getting genital herpes, and a 50 percent chance of contracting gonorrhea.

Chlamydia is more common among teens than among older men and women. In some testing situations, 10 to 29 percent of sexually active teenage women and 10 percent of teenage men were found to have Chlamydia.

Teens have higher rates of gonorrhea than sexually active men and women aged 20 to 44.
Talking to your child about sex and sexually transmitted diseases may not be something you look forward to, but it could be the most important step in protecting your child from risky sexual behavior. Studies show that teenagers who feel highly connected to their parents are far more likely to delay sexual activity than their peers. Before approaching this sensitive topic, consider the following tips developed by Peer to Peer: Stop, Think, Be Safe!

Start early – Research shows that younger children seek their parent's advice more than adolescents, who tend to depend more on their friends and the media. Take advantage of the opportunity to talk with your young children about sexual health. Discussing dating, relationships, STDs and HIV can make a lasting impression. And it gives you a chance to provide your children with accurate information that reflects your personal values and principles. The quality of parent-child relationships has an important influence on adolescents' sexual behaviors.
Initiate conversations with your child – Don't wait for your children to ask you about sex, HIV or STDs. Although you can hope that your children come to you with their questions and concerns, it may not happen. Use everyday opportunities to talk about issues related sexual health. For example, news stories, music, television shows or movies are great starters for bringing up health topics. If your family is watching a television show where the teenagers are promiscuous or a teen is pregnant, ask your kids what they thought of the program when it’s over. Ask if they agree with the behavior or decisions of the teenagers in the show. Just a few questions can start a valuable conversation.

Talk WITH your child, not AT your child – Make sure you listen to your children the way you want your children to listen to you. Try to ask questions that will encourage them to share specific information about feelings, decisions and actions. Try to understand exactly what your kids are saying. It is important for your kids to feel that they have been heard. Try not to be judgmental. Let your kids know that you value their opinions, even when they differ from your own.

Create an open environment – Research shows that kids who feel their parents speak openly about sex and listen to them carefully are less likely to engage in high-risk behaviors, compared to teenagers who do not feel they can talk with their parents about sex. Adolescents who report a sense of connection to their parents, family and school, and who have a higher grade point average, are more likely than other teens to wait to engage in intercourse. Teens who report previous discussions of sexuality with parents are seven times more likely to feel able to communicate with a partner about HIV/AIDS than those who have not had such discussions. An open family environment not only reduces sexual risk-taking behaviors, it also gives teenagers a safe place to ask questions and get accurate information. As parents, be available, honest and attentive. Praise your children for coming to you to talk about sex, which will teach them that you are always available for information or advice.

Be prepared and practice – It isn't necessarily easy to talk about sex with your kids. In fact, it can be extremely difficult for some parents. Don't be afraid to practice. You can practice in front of a mirror, with your spouse or partner, or with friends. Your ability to speak comfortably about sexual health will make your children more comfortable asking questions and discussing sensitive issues.

Be honest: It's okay to say, "I don't know" – When your children trust and value your opinion, they will be more likely to come to you with their questions and concerns. It’s also important to know that you do not need to be a sexual health expert. It's okay if you don't know all the answers to all of your children's questions. It’s okay and honest to say, "I don't know." In fact, if you don't know the answer to a question, you can search for the correct information together.
Communicate your values – In addition to talking to your children about the biological facts of sex, it's important that they also learn that sexual relationships involve emotions, caring and responsibility. Parents need to share their values and principles about sex. Although your children may not adopt these values as their own, they are an important source of information as your children develop their own set of values about sexuality.

References
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention
Peer to Peer: Stop, Think, Be Safe!
U.S. Department of Health & Human Services
Campaign for our Children, Inc.

Sue Scheff: Inhalant Abuse

2008-07-13T05:24:00.001-07:00

In 2004, the Alliance for Consumer Education launched ITS Inhalant Abuse Prevention Kit at a national press conference at the National Press Club in Washington DC. The kit was successfully tested in 6 pilot states across the country. Currently, ACE’s Inhalant Abuse Prevention Kit is in all 50 states. Furthermore, the Kit is in its third printing due to high demands.

The Kit is intended for presentations to adult audiences. Specifically parents of elementary and middle school children, so they can talk to their children about the dangers and risks associated with Inhalants. We base the program on data from the Partnership for a Drug-Free America. Statistics show that parents talking to their kids about drugs decrease the risk of the kids trying a drug.

The Inhalant Abuse Prevention Kit contains 4 components: the Facilitator’s Guide, a FAQ sheet, an interactive PowerPoint presentation, and a “What Every Parent Needs to Know about Inhalant Abuse” brochure. Additionally, there are 4 printable posters for classroom use, presentations, etc.

Visit http://www.inhalant.org/

Teenage Depression

2008-07-08T07:18:00.000-07:00

Depression Causes

There are many causes of teen depression. The most common causes are:

Significant life events like the death of a family member or close friend, parents divorce or split, breaking up with a boyfriend or girlfriend, or moving to a new school/area.

Emotional/Physical neglect, being separated from a nurturer, abuse, damage to self esteem.

Many changes happening too quickly can cause depression. For some teens, any major change at one time can trigger symptoms.

Stress, especially in cases where the teen has little or no emotional support from parents, other family members, or friends.

Past traumatic events or experiences like sexual abuse, general abuse, or other major experiences often harbor deep within a child and emerge in the teen years.

Most children are unable to process these types of events when they happen, but of course, they remember them. As they age, the events/experiences become clearer and they gain new understanding.

Changes associated with puberty often cause emotions labeled as depression.

Abuse of drugs or other substances can cause changes in the brainÕs chemistry, in many cases, causing some types of depression.

Some medical conditions such as hypothyroidism are believed to affect hormone and mood balance. Physical pain that is chronic can also trigger depression. In many cases, depression caused by medical conditions disappears when medical attention is sought and treatment occurs.
Depression is a genetic disorder, and teens with family members who have suffered from depression have a higher chance of developing it themselves.

Parents Universal Resource Experts, Sue Scheff - Don't Be Cyber Bullied

2008-07-01T04:35:00.001-07:00

By Love Our Children USA

Cyber Bullying is social terror by technology ... and it’s on the rise.

When a kid of any age, up to 18 is threatened, humiliated, harassed, or humiliated via use of technology --- this is Cyber Bullying. It’s harmful and it’s dangerous!

This social online terror is used through e-mail, cell phones, pager text messages, instant messaging, Web sites, online personal polling Web sites. It is done by kids deliberately and repeatedly and is used by an individual or group with the intention of harming other kids and teens.

It’s cool to use technology to talk to your friends and make new ones. While most kids use the Internet responsibly, others are using all of this technology to terrorize and Cyberbully!

Cyber Bullying is the perfect way for bullies to remain anonymous.

Cyber Bullying makes it easier for bullies because they are not face to face with their victim(s.)

Read Entire Article here: http://www.loveourchildrenusa.org/kidsteens_cyberbullying.php

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Political Teens

2008-06-26T07:21:00.000-07:00

By Connect with Kids

“When parents talk about politics with their kids, when they participate themselves — this leads to a higher level of interest in politics among their children,”

– Dr. Alan Abramowitz, Political Science Professor, Emory University

Nineteen-year-old Will Kelly is pounding the pavement, knocking on doors and talking to voters.

Seventeen-year-old Amelia Hartley is answering phones, making copies and filing news clips.

She is a die-hard Democrat, and he is a faithful Republican. Both teenagers have a passion for politics and for getting involved.

“To be honest,” Will says of his volunteer work, “because I care about what’s going on and it troubles me to see how so many people become apathetic with what they do have in this country – that we take so much for granted.”

“At 17, I can’t vote yet, I don’t pay taxes, but within a year I’m going to have to know enough about leaders – not only national, but local and state – to be able to say who I want running things,” says Amelia of her involvement.

According to the Center for Information and Research on Civic Learning and Engagement, young voters are turning up in record numbers this presidential election.

One reason, experts say, their parents.

“There has been quite a bit of research that shows that when parents talk about politics with their kids, when they participate themselves, when they take their kids to vote with them, that all this leads to a higher level of interest in politics among the children,” says Dr. Alan Abramowitz, a political science professor at Emory University.

It is a level of interest, Dr. Abramowitz adds, that persists over time. “Even many years later, those who were raised in families that were politically active and where the parents talked about politics remain more active themselves.”

Amelia and Will say they’ve been invigorated by the hard work of politics. And, in fact, it’s sparked an interest.

“Is there a future in politics for me?” Will ponders. “Well that’s a question I seem to ask myself a lot. We’ll have to see.”

“There are a lot of career paths I’m considering,” says Amelia, “and politics is definitely one of them.”

Tips for Parents

The polls are showing teens are lining up in record numbers to have their say in this year’s election. Consider these statistics from a recent poll by Time Magazine, among 18-29 year olds:

70% said they are paying attention to the race
53% said Barack Obama was the candidate best described as ‘inspirational’
83% said this election will have a great impact on the country
A majority (54%) say the US was wrong to go to war in Iraq

80% of young people rate the economic conditions in this country as only fair or poor
Nearly three-quarters of the respondents said they feel the country is headed down the wrong track

Affordable health care (62%), the Iraq War (59%), and being able to find a stable, good paying job (58%) are the top issues a majority of young people worry about the most.
More than 6.5 million young people under the age of 30 participated in the 2008 primaries and caucuses. In fact, Obama’s margin of victory in Iowa came almost entirely from voters under 25 years old. In New Hampshire, his edge among young voters was 3 to 1; in Nevada, it was 2 to 1; and in Michigan, nearly 50,000 under-30s voted “Uncommitted” because Clinton’s name was the only one on the ballot.

The Center for Information and Research on Civic Learning and Engagement, getting kids involved in a civics or government class is a great way to get them more interested in the elections. From the 2006 Civic and Political Health of the Nation Report, young people who report that they recently choose to take a civics or government class are more likely than other young people to say that:

they helped solve a community problem,
they can make a difference in their community,
they have volunteered recently,
they trust other people and the government,
they have made consumer decisions for ethical or political reasons,
they believe in the importance of voting, and
they are registered to vote.

Parents are also one of the greatest influences on young voters.

Start with the basics. Make sure your 18-year-old knows when and where to vote.
Getting your 18-year-old to the polls could pay big dividends. People who have been motivated to vote once are more likely to become repeat voters.

Acquire and fill out voter registration forms with your teen. If your teen meets age requirements, you should each fill out a voter registration form.

If your teen meets age requirements on Election Day, go to your polling place together to cast your ballots.
If your teen doesn’t meet age requirements for the 2008 election, but will turn 18 before the 2012 election, involve them in the current election as preparation for the next election.
Consider taking teens between 14 and 17 to the polling place with you. Even if they are not permitted inside for security reasons, the visit will demystify the voting process.

Remind your child that the November election is the result of many local primaries and that Americans are able to vote for their national, state and local leaders.

Kids who are not old enough to vote can still have an impact on elections. Encourage kids to get involved in the political process. They can go door-to-door in support of candidates or help with fundraising efforts.

It can seem daunting to research candidates, because information on the different races is not centralized in one place. Parents can share news articles with their kids. The key is to engage students with issues they will find relevant to their lives.

References
Time Magazine
The Center for Information and Research on Civic Learning and Engagement

Sue Scheff: ADHD Medication At School

2008-06-21T07:07:00.001-07:00

By ADDitude Magazine

Guidelines to follow if your child needs a dose of ADHD medication during the school day.

If your child takes medication for attention deficit disorder (ADD ADHD), make sure it's administered on schedule and that it's working as intended. Along with the doctor, the classroom teacher and school nurse can be valuable allies in this effort. Include the following steps in your medication plan.

Make sure your child's symptoms are "covered" whenever necessary.
Consider the possibility that he may need coverage beyond school hours—so that he can complete homework assignments and enjoy after-school activities and social relationships.
Remember that the duration listed on a medication's package materials is only an approximation. A four-hour tablet might control symptoms for as few as three hours—or as many as five. A 12-hour form might last only 10 hours.

Read entire article here: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/1035.html

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Keeping Your Kids Safe Online

2008-06-20T07:07:00.001-07:00

On Tuesday, June 17th Dr. Paul featured Michael Fertik, CEO of Reputation Defender. If you are a parent of a child that surfs online - this is an important Podcast for your to listen to.

From http://parentalpower.wordpress.com/:

Michael Fertik is a repeat Internet entrepreneur and CEO with experience in technology and law. After law school, he clerked for Chief Judge Danny J. Boggs of the Sixth Circuit Court of Appeals of the United States. He is a graduate of Harvard College and Harvard Law School. His company, Reputation Defender, helps parents to know what is online about their children, and provides services to find and eliminate potentially dangerous or damaging content.

June17th Call

On this call, Michael discusses some important information and resources to help parents become more proactive about knowing what is out there about their family, and doing something about it.

Click here to listen: http://parentalpower.wordpress.com/

Sue Scheff: Teens and Energy Drinks

2008-06-19T06:41:00.000-07:00

By Connect with Kids

“They’re going to get that boost, but in the long run they’re not going to be doing their best. And they may not even notice they’re not doing their best.”

– Elizabeth Redmond, Ph.D., Nutritionist.

In the past few years the market for so called ‘energy drinks’ has exploded. Full of sugar and caffeine, there’s now around a dozen energy drinks on the market, and they’re very popular with kids.

“I’ve had Rockstar,” says Hunter, 13.

Thirteen-year-old Will’s favorites? “Monster, Rooster Booster.”

“Sobe’s Adrenaline Rush,” answers T-J, 14.

“It tastes very good,” explains 16-year-old Corrissa, “It gives me energy.”

Energy, according to some of the marketing, makes these drinks good for school or sports performance. “They do kind of imply they’re sports drinks,” says Nutritionist Elizabeth Redmond, Ph.D., “but a sports drink like Gatorade or something would hydrate you. And these drinks have a lot of caffeine, and they’re actually going to have a diuretic effect and can dehydrate.”

And while the caffeine in many of these drinks, the same as the amount in an average cup of coffee, gives kids a boost, a couple hours later, they crash.

“Yeah if I drink one I might be kind of hyper for a while and then I’ll be like ‘Ehhhh’ and get real tired,” explains 12-year-old Luke.

Experts add the side effects of caffeine also include loss of appetite, moodiness, headaches, nausea, difficulty sleeping.

And while there haven’t been any long term studies on the effect of regular caffeine use by kids, Redmond explains that, “Once you get used to the caffeine boost you’re going to want to keep getting it. But it’s just not a healthy lifestyle that you want to get into.”

Experts say parents should teach kids caffeine can be addictive, and that if they’re looking for better performance, there’s a much better way. “Getting enough sleep, being hydrated and eating a healthy diet would be the three biggest things you’d want to look at if you wanted to get more energy to do better at sports,” says Redmond.

Tips for Parents
Now more than ever, it seems that students are relying on caffeinated products like coffee, Red Bull and caffeine pills to help them stay awake to study for tests. In fact, some experts report that caffeine dependency among high school students has steadily increased over the past five years. Consider these recent studies of children and caffeine consumption:

A researcher at the University of California-San Francisco found that when school-aged children took a high daily dose of caffeine, their attention span decreased. And after the effects of the caffeine dissipated, their performance in various tasks was impaired.
National Institute of Mental Health child psychiatry researcher Judith Rapoport, M.D., found 8- to-13-year-olds who regularly consumed high doses of caffeine were judged more restless by teachers, and that one-third were hyperactive enough to meet the criteria for attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).
In a study by Stanford University neurobiologist Avram Goldstein, fifth- and sixth-graders at a Denver school deprived of daily caffeine reported having symptoms including trouble thinking clearly, not feeling energetic and getting angry. Even children who typically consume 28 milligrams a day (less than an average soda) felt symptoms.
Since caffeine leaches small amounts of calcium from the bones, a 1994 Harvard study concluded that soda consumption increases the possibility for bone fracture among teenage girls.
Even though these products may seem like a quick fix for helping students study late into the night, most teens are unaware of how caffeine affects their bodies. According to the Nemours Foundation, caffeine is a mild stimulant that causes increased heart rate and alertness. Most people who are sensitive to caffeine experience a temporary increase in energy and elevation in mood. Yet, this energized feeling quickly evaporates and leaves students feeling tired and irritable. The Mayo Clinic cites these additional side effects of caffeine:

Insomnia
Heartburn
Intestinal upsets, such as constipation and diarrhea
Headaches
Jitters, anxiety, heart palpitations or rapid heart rate
Increase in blood pressure
Temporary depression
Calcium loss: Kids build their peak bone mass as they grow through calcium intake and exercise. Yet, caffeine causes calcium loss, so if they’re drinking more coffee and soda, but less milk, they not only get less calcium from the dairy products but also lose calcium due to increased caffeine intake.
Dehydration: Because caffeine is a diuretic, it can cause your body to become weak from not having enough water. Although you may think you’re getting plenty of liquids, caffeine works against the body in two ways: It has a dehydrating effect on the body’s cells and increases the need to urinate. It is particularly important for active teens who play sports to drink non-caffeinated beverages each day to avoid dehydration.
Even though these side effects exist, caffeine remains one of the most popular drugs in the United States. Experts estimate that more than 90% of Americans consume caffeine every day, while 11 million Americans consume too much caffeine (over 300 milligrams). While no definitive numbers exist concerning how much coffee teens consume, the U.S. Department of Agriculture estimates that children and teens guzzle more than 64 gallons of caffeinated soda a year – an amount that has tripled for teens since 1978, doubled for the 6-11 set and increased by a quarter for under-5 tots.

According to the International Food Information Council Foundation (IFICF), coffee is the chief source of caffeine in the United States. An 8-ounce cup of drip-brewed coffee typically contains 85 milligrams of caffeine. An 8-ounce serving of brewed tea has 40 milligrams, caffeinated soft drinks contain an average of 24 milligrams per 8-ounce serving and an ounce of milk chocolate has just 6 milligrams. Even though these products contain caffeine, they can all be found at school and at home, increasing the amount that teens consume.

Some health officials are concerned about the rise in popularity of so-called ‘energy drinks.’ Part of their concern is that the drinks, including Red Bull, Adrenaline Rush, and Rock Star Energy Drink, are being misused as party drinks. According to an online publication of the Boston University School of Public Health, the beverages are used by party-goers to get drunk faster. “It definitely put me on a fast pace,” one young woman told BU. “It gets you drunk quicker if you can stand the taste of it.”

Most of the drinks contain stimulants such as caffeine and guarana, a derivative of a South American plant.
Officials are concerned about the effects of the high-energy drinks when mixed with alcohol. What exactly is in an energy drink like Red Bull? Here’s a list of some ingredients from the manufacturer’s web site:

Taurine. An amino acid.
Glucoronolactone. Said to “accelerate the elimination of…harmful substances…has a detoxifying effect.”
Caffeine. Known for its stimulating effect.
Carbohydrates. Sugar in the form of sucrose and glucose.
Vitamins. B-complex vitamins.
The company that manufactures Red Bull says the drink was developed especially for “times of increased stress or strain.” Red Bull claims to:

Increase physical endurance
Improve reaction speed and concentration
Increase mental alertness
Improves the overall feeling of well being
Stimulate metabolism and increase stamina
But the main concern among doctors is the effect of energy drinks when mixed with alcoholic beverages like Vodka. What you get, one nutritionist says, is “a wide-awake drunk.”

Just because your child may be drinking energy beverages, doesn’t necessarily mean he or she is mixing them with alcohol. There are signs of teenage drinking parents can be on the lookout for. The National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence has some tips on how to tell if your child may be in trouble with alcohol:

Smell of alcohol on breath, or sudden, frequent use of breath mints.
Abrupt changes in mood or attitude.
Sudden decline in attendance or performance at school.
Sudden resistance to discipline at school.
Uncharacteristic withdrawal from family, friends or interests.
Heightened secrecy about actions or possessions.
Association with a new group of friends whom your child refuses to discuss.
References
University of Buffalo
United States Department of Agriculture
National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence, Inc.
Boston University School of Public Health

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Teens and Gateway Drugs

2008-06-17T09:39:00.001-07:00

A gateway drug is a drug that opens the metaphorical gateway to more potent, dangerous drugs. Substances like alcohol, cigarettes and marijuana are considered gateway drugs. While many parents are tempted to say "it's only beer" or "its just pot", the danger in gateway drugs is their ability to convince the user that they can handle larger quantities or in many cases, stronger, more potent substances.

Learn more at Teen Drug Prevention.

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) How to Hang with your Teen

2008-06-15T06:28:00.001-07:00

By Shoulder to Shoulder

Ok, we know it may seem like an oxymoron: parents and teens having fun together? It has been known to happen. Whether its family activities, time just for you and your teen, special events and trips or just the every day activities around the house, find ways to create fun and connections with teens.

HERE ARE SOME IDEAS:

Read the same book and then talk about it.
Take a class together. Try dog obedience or cooking classes.
Go out for lunch to celebrate the beginning of the school year.
Celebrate half birthdays with a special family meal.
Share a subscription to a favorite teen magazine and talk about one article.
Cook a special meal together for someone who is ill.
Go to a music store and listen to their favorite CDs. Then have them listen to our music. (Ignore the groans.)
Take your teen to work with you.
Build something together.
Take a trip by car and visit places that were special to you when you were your teen’s age.
Go for a bike ride with one of their friends and the friend’s parent.
Have a favorite “breakfast diner” and eat there once a month.
Schedule your lunch hour during your teen’s lunch break - check them out of school and take your teen to lunch.
Ask your teen for suggestions.

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) The Emotional Lives of Adolescents

2008-06-13T10:53:00.000-07:00

By Education.com

Building a Bridge Between Dependence and Autonomy
Author: Alexandra DeGeorge, Psy.D.Source: NYU Child Study Center

Although adolescence was once believed to be a time of rebellion and tumult, we now know that this developmental stage is calmer than previously assumed. The "rebellion" often seen in teens is likely due to the increased physical, cognitive and social changes that occur in development. During this period, parents may feel as if their teen has turned into another person. Teenagers are often described as "moody," "irritable," "argumentative," "indecisive" and "consumed with oneself." The once docile school-aged child is now snapping back to her parents when she isn't able to wear a particular outfit to school.

The child who listened and agreed with his father's reasoning for the way things work in the world is suddenly questioning his father's explanations and values. Still at other times, your adolescent appears understanding and accepting of your advice. Typical experiences include both of these extremes, vacillating between occasions where your teen reaches out and requests your support with occasions where your opinions are rejected. Family conflict that ensues commonly centers on everyday issues.

For example, you may be likely to argue with your teen over the clothing he chooses, amount of time she spends on the computer, or setting a curfew.Why the observable differences in your child? Throughout this phase of development, a bridge is forming between childhood and adulthood. The teen begins to develop independence and autonomy while also remaining reliant on the family. The period of adolescence is fraught with many changes, and as we look at them in context, we begin to understand the responses that typify teenage behavior.

Read the full article here: http://www.education.com/reference/article/Ref_Emotional_Lives/

http://www.education.com/

http://www.helpyourteens.com/

http://www.witsendbook.com/

It Started With Pop-Tarts...An Alternative Approach to Winning the Battle of Bulimia

2008-06-12T13:08:00.000-07:00

Learn More about Teen Eating Disorders:

It Started With Pop-Tarts®... at the age of 14. Lori Hanson’s bulimia was at its worst during college and as a young career woman starting to climb the corporate ladder. After a bout with counseling in her twenties Hanson looked for ways to heal on her own. She discovered the power of the sub-conscious mind and her alternative path to healing began. Hanson’s story shares the grim realities of a life obsessed sprinkled with humor and inspiration. And most importantly five key strategies with practical steps to help readers recover from eating disorders holistically.

Remember, type the title name in the Amazon Box - and find it quickly!

Sue Scheff: Learn More About How Teenage Acne Can Effect Your Child by Johanna Curtis, Skin Specialist

2008-06-08T10:21:00.001-07:00

Visit www.teenage-acne.net

95% of teenagers in American suffer from acne. The effects of this common problem can be truly devastating. It isn’t just the scars that are left by a bad case of teenage acne; there are many emotional effects as well. Some of which can follow you for life!

Whether it’s right or wrong, we teach our children that the way we look matters. With this societal dogma come many issues when, as a teen, you cannot look your best. With the blemishes that come with acne, many teens experience self esteem issues. These issues may range from being mildly self-conscious to a complete withdrawal from the world. There are actually many emotional issues that come from our need to look our best combined with a case of acne.

Some of the more common issues that result from teenage acne include:

Reduced Self-Confidence
Social Dysfunction
Frustration
Poor Self Image
Embarrassment
Clinical Depression
Problems with Anxiety
Facial Scaring
The reality of it is that even a mild case of acne can greatly affect the way you live. A few simple blemishes can leave you feeling completely self conscious. For those with more severe cases, they often face ridicule which leads to shame and embarrassment.

With all of this it brings us to the main question: What can be done for teenage acne? Luckily there is an answer. A teenage acne solution that will work where other teen acne medications have failed! Before we talk about the real solution, let’s talk about traditional acne treatments. Likely you have tried some of these products, and it’s very likely you found that they simply didn’t perform to your expectations.

The Problem with Other Teenage Acne Medicines:

Store Bought Solutions don’t Work:
When it comes to curing acne, everyone claims to have the best solution. The problem with most of these products is that they are hard on your skin, and the results are minimal at best. Worse than that, even when the store bought solutions do seem to be working – the effect is only superficial; These products do not get to the root of the problem. As soon as you quit using that commercial acne treatment, guess what happens: your acne comes back!

Prescription Acne Medicines are Dangerous:
Then there are the prescription acne medicines. Although these may work better than that cheap solution you bought at your department store, the side effects of many of these medicines include: damaged skin, skin irritation, nausea, skin burns, and even liver damage! The prescription medicines for acne are quite scary, and for some people, quite dangerous as well. Imagine needing a liver transplant because you were trying to get rid of a few zits!

Laser Treatments Will Cost You Thousands:
Another method for treating teenage acne, that produces varied results, is laser treatment. With this type of treatment lasers are used to remove blemishes. Some people have had okay results with laser treatments, while many others claim the minimal results were not worth the price. Which brings us to the big problem with laser treatment: You will spend thousands of dollars, and there is no guarantee of any result at all! To make matters worse, some people have claimed that their skin was burned or scarred from laser treatments.

Sue Scheff: What is Inhalant Abuse?

2008-06-07T08:28:00.000-07:00

As a parent advocate, I am shocked at the growing abuse of inhalants among teens and pre-teens. This is a subject that is not discussed enough. Inhalant are easily accessible in most homes today. Learn more by visiting http://www.inhalant.org/ - After being contacted by a wonderful and caring mother that lost her son to inhalant use, I feel I need to help her be a voice to educate parents everywhere.

What is Inhalant Abuse?

Inhalant abuse refers to the deliberate inhalation or sniffing of common products found in homes and communities with the purpose of “getting high.” Inhalants are easily accessible, legal, everyday products. When used as intended, these products have a useful purpose in our lives and enhance the quality of life, but when intentionally misused, they can be deadly. Inhalant Abuse is a lesser recognized form of substance abuse, but it is no less dangerous. Inhalants are addictive and are considered to be “gateway” drugs because children often progress from inhalants to illegal drug and alcohol abuse. The National Institute on Drug Abuse reports that one in five American teens have used Inhalants to get high.

Inhalation is referred to as huffing, sniffing, dusting or bagging and generally occurs through the nose or mouth. Huffing is when a chemically soaked rag is held to the face or stuffed in the mouth and the substance is inhaled. Sniffing can be done directly from containers, plastic bags, clothing or rags saturated with a substance or from the product directly. With Bagging, substances are sprayed or deposited into a plastic or paper bag and the vapors are inhaled. This method can result in suffocation because a bag is placed over the individual’s head, cutting off the supply of oxygen.
Other methods used include placing inhalants on sleeves, collars, or other items of clothing that are sniffed over a period of time. Fumes are discharged into soda cans and inhaled from the can or balloons are filled with nitrous oxide and the vapors are inhaled. Heating volatile substances and inhaling the vapors emitted is another form of inhalation. All of these methods are potentially harmful or deadly. Experts estimate that there are several hundred deaths each year from Inhalant Abuse, although under-reporting is still a problem.

What Products Can be Abused?

There are more than a 1,400 products which are potentially dangerous when inhaled, such as typewriter correction fluid, air conditioning coolant, gasoline, propane, felt tip markers, spray paint, air freshener, butane, cooking spray, paint, and glue. Most are common products that can be found in the home, garage, office, school or as close as the local convenience store. The best advice for consumers is to read the labels before using a product to ensure the proper method is observed. It is also recommended that parents discuss the product labels with their children at age-appropriate times. The following list represents categories of products that are commonly abused.

Click here for a list of abusable products.

Sue Scheff: “A Parent’s Guide to the Teen Brain”. This new site is designed to help parents decode teen behavior and connect with their kids.

2008-06-06T03:58:00.000-07:00

MEDIA ADVISORY

The Partnership for a Drug Free America to Hold a Virtual Press Conference Announcing Launch of “A Parent’s Guide to the Teen Brain”

- New Site to Help Parents Decode Teen Behavior and Connect with their Kids
- Release of the 20th annual Partnership Attitude Tracking Study

WHAT: The Partnership for a Drug Free America will debut their newest online parenting tool: “A Parent’s Guide to the Teen Brain.” The site launch also coincides with the release of the 20th annual Partnership Attitude Tracking Study (PATS), a survey of parents’ attitudes about drugs and alcohol.

WHY: For every parent of a teenager who has ever wondered “who is this kid?” the website aims to make answering that question easier. Designed to help parents navigate the confusing, often frustrating teen years, “A Parent’s Guide to the Teen Brain” translates recent scientific findings that shed light on how brain development shapes teens’ behavior and personalities into easy-to-understand tips and tools for parents.

The site explains that the human brain takes 25 years to fully develop, with areas responsible for complex judgment and decision-making maturing last. Through video, humorous interactive segments, role-playing and advice from experts, parents learn how adolescent brain development explains the “normal” teen behaviors that often confound parents—impulsiveness, rebellion, high emotions and risk-taking, especially with drugs and alcohol—and how to use this new information to connect with their teens.

The 2007 PATS study shows that as kids become teenagers, their parents need for information and help talking about drugs and alcohol peaks, and parents’ confidence in their ability to keep kids from using drugs and alcohol begins to wane.

WHO: A distinguished panel of experts will participate in a discussion about “A Parent’s
Guide to the Teen Brain including:
• Steve Pasierb: President and Chief Executive Officer of the Partnership for a Drug Free America
• Ken Winters, Ph.D.: director of the Center for Adolescent Substance Abuse Research, a Professor in the Department of Psychiatry at the University of Minnesota, and a Senior Scientist with the Treatment Research Institute, Philadelphia, PA.
• Tara Paterson: certified parenting coach, mother of three, founder of the Mom’s Choice Awards (which honor excellence in family friendly media, products and services), author of the upcoming book Raising Intuitive Children and contributor to justformom.com.

Highlights of the Virtual Press Conference will include:
• Detailed explanation/run through of “A Parents Guide to the Teen Brain”
• Explanation about the links between teen behavior and the physiological changes happening in the teen brain
• Explanation of findings from the 2007 PATS study
• Discussion of how to apply the scientific findings about the teen brain to real life
• Valuable insight from a parent and parenting coach

WHERE TO REGISTER*: www.iian.ibeam.com/events/otsp001/26609/

WHEN: June 11, 2008 from 10:00 am – 11:00 am

To download video of the webcast in broadcast quality format (available June 11th from 10am – 11am ET) please visit the coordinates below:

Galaxy 26 Transponder 1 C BAND Analog
Downlink frequency is 3720 Vertica

Beta copies can be requested after the event, but will require additional time for delivery.

Media Contacts: Judy Klein, o: 212-251-1204, m: 917-282-9352, e: jklein@ckpr.biz
Paul Costiglio, o: 212-973-3530, m: 917-686-8697, e: paul_costiglio@drugfree.org

For more information about the Partnership for a Drug-Free America, visit www.drugfree.org.
# # #

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) It's Normal - Raising Teens

2008-06-05T09:09:00.000-07:00

Source: Shoulder to Shoulder

Wondering what happened to the sweet kids we were raising? They've turned into teenagers. While we know there are going to be good and bad times, it's helpful to know that some of this "crazy" behavior is just part of being a teen.

It's normal for a teen to:

Argue for the Sake of Arguing
Believe it or not, teens can find arguing exciting. As they grow, they are developing new skills in thinking and logic. This means that arguments with you aren't necessarily about winning, but rather experiencing the "art" of an argument. Fun, isn't it?

Be Self-Centered
It's all about them. You know the whole world isn't focused on their zit, but they truly believe it is. All we can do is be patient and help them through the "disasters" as best we can.

Be Dramatic
Why is everything such a big deal to teens? Jenny has a fight with her boyfriend and it's the end of the world. While it's good for teens to - ahem - care deeply about so many things, the drama will decline as they grow up.

Jump to Conclusions
As teens develop the capacity to think logically, they sometimes make leaps in judgment and come to bizarre conclusions. Resist the urge to correct. Listen to what they are saying, and let them think out loud. When asked, offer your perspective.

Find Fault
Can we ever do anything right in the eyes of teens? We can't take it personally (even though we could do no wrong when they were younger), and this isn't a sign of failure. It's just a normal part of the teen years. And yes, we really do a lot of things right.

Sue Scheff: Talk to your Children about Alcoholism

2008-06-03T04:11:00.000-07:00

Source: National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism

Quick Facts

Kids who drink are more likely to be victims of violent crime, to be involved in alcohol-related traffic crashes, and to have serious school-related problems.
You have more influence on your childâ€™s values and decisions about drinking before he or she begins to use alcohol.

Parents can have a major impact on their childrenâ€™s drinking, especially during the preteen and early teen years.

Read the entire article here: http://www.education.com/reference/article/Ref_Make_Difference_Talk/
http://www.education.com/
http://www.helpyourteens.com/
http://www.witsendbook.com/

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) The Psychological Effects of Teenage Acne on Boys and Girls

2008-06-01T05:47:00.000-07:00

http://www.teenage-acne.net/ is a comprehensive website and organization founded by a licensed skin care professional, Johanna Curtis.

Any person who has had even a minor experience with acne can attest to how devastating its psychological effects can be.

Sue Scheff: Summer Reading for Parents and Kids

2008-05-31T05:11:00.001-07:00

Summer is almost here and what a better time to catch up on relaxation and reading!

Go to your local library with your kids or a bookstore and find some educational and fun books to read. Health Communications Inc. http://www.hcibooks.com/ offers a wide variety of wonderful books for both parents and kids today.

Also check out http://www.helpyourteens.com/books.html

Sue Scheff: How to get a teen to talk

2008-05-27T12:16:00.000-07:00

By ParentingMyTeen

As the parent of a teen, you may long for the days when you could hold your child on your lap and they were eager to talk, Those days may be long gone, but you can still find ways to get your teen to talk and really start to connect with your teen.

To many parents, their teen is a closed book and getting a teen to talk can be like trying to make the earth stop rotating. At times it seems impossible to get them to open up and talk about their lives. But talking to your teen and knowing about their lives is one of the best ways to protect them from danger. Spying and snooping around isn’t the best way to get that information either, it will only upset matters if your teen finds out.

Here are a few tips on how to get a teen to talk:

Start young. Keeping a relationship going with your child is easier than starting one when you haven’t had one before. You may find them trying to pull away once they hit a certain age; just keep at it.

Find common ground. To get your teen to talk, first search for things that you and your teen are both interested in. It’s easier to talk about something that you both have in common. That way, you can ask your child about a band’s new album rather than the same old “how was school?”

Be open to what they say. When you get your teen talking, don’t be surprised if they say some things you don’t like. Just be open to what they’re telling you instead of being judgmental. You can tell them you don’t approve of something without attacking them. If they feel comfortable talking about serious things, they’ll be more likely to come to you if they have a problem.

Spend more together. A recent study showed that many teens rate not having enough time with their parents as one of their top concerns. Many teens feel they can’t talk to their parents because they’re always at work or busy doing something else. We often forget to take time out from our hectic lives to pay enough attention to our kids. Some suggestions for spending extra time with your teen are:

Set up a specific time every week to spend time with your teen
Have dinner at the table with the whole family as often as possible
Work out or engage in a sport with your kids
Drive your teen to school instead of sending them on the bus
While your teen may be reluctant to talk to you at first, keep trying. Likely, you’ll eventually break them down and they’ll look forward to talking with you and spending time together.

www.helpyourteens.com

www.witsendbook.com

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) KidsHealth Educational Partner

2008-05-26T06:29:00.001-07:00

KidsHealth offers a comprehensive website of articles, helpful tips for parenting, sound advice for teens and kids. Visit http://www.kidshealth.org/ to learn more.

Darrington Academy, Royal Gorge Academy, Carolina Springs Academy, Midwest Academy, Red River Academy, Lisa Irvin, WWASPS etc...

2008-05-25T08:59:00.000-07:00

Are you considering any of the following programs for your child? Take a moment to read my experiences - www.aparentstruestory.com as well as my book where you can hear my daughter's experiences for the first time - order today at www.witsendbook.com .

Choosing a program is not only a huge emotional decision, it is a major financial decision - do your homework!

Academy of Ivy Ridge, NY (withdrew their affiliation with WWASPS)
Canyon View Park, MT
Camas Ranch, MT
Carolina Springs Academy, SC
Cross Creek Programs, UT (Cross Creek Center and Cross Creek Manor)
Darrington Academy, GA
Help My Teen, UT (Adolescent Services Adolescent Placement) Promotes and markets these programs.
Gulf Coast Academy, MS
Horizon Academy, NV
Lisa Irvin (Helpmyteen)
Lifelines Family Services, UT (Promotes and markets these programs) Jane Hawley
Majestic Ranch, UT
Midwest Academy, IA (Brian Viafanua, formerly the Director of Paradise Cove as shown on Primetime, is the current Director here)
Parent Teen Guide (Promotes and markets these programs)
Pillars of Hope, Costa Rica
Pine View Christian Academy (Borders FL, AL, MS)
Reality Trek, UT
Red River Academy, LA (Borders TX)
Royal Gorge Academy, CO
Sky View Academy, NV
Spring Creek Lodge, MT
Teen Help, UT (Promotes and markets these programs)
Teens In Crisis
Tranquility Bay, Jamaica

Alliance for Consumer Education (ACE)

2008-05-24T14:00:00.001-07:00

Welcome to the Alliance for Consumer Education's (ACE) inhalant abuse prevention site! ACE is a nonprofit organization dedicated to advancing community health and well-being.

Did you know 1 in 5 children will abuse inhalants by the 8th grade? Inhalant abuse refers to the deliberate inhalation or sniffing of fumes, vapors or gases from common household products for the purpose of "getting high".

This site is designed to assist you in learning more about inhalant abuse prevention and giving you tools to help raise the awareness of others. While here be sure to check out our free printable resources, and post any comments or questions on ACE’s community message board.

http://www.inhalant.org/
http://www.helpyourteens.com/

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Understanding Teen Decision Making

2008-05-23T06:11:00.001-07:00

Source: U.S. Department of Health and Human Services

What was he thinking? How could she? If you find yourself wondering what your teen was thinking, the answer may be not much. Kids often make snap judgments based on impulse, especially when situations come up quickly, leaving teens with little time to sort through the pros and cons.

Some of those hasty decisions may involve cheating in school; skipping class; using alcohol, tobacco, or illegal drugs; going somewhere or being with someone that you do not approve of; or driving too fast. But the consequences can include losing your trust, letting down friends, getting into trouble, hurting education and job prospects, causing illness or injury, or leading to other reckless behavior.

Click here for entire article from http://www.education.com/

http://www.helpyourteens.com/

http://www.witsendbook.com/

http://www.suescheff.com/

Sue Scheff: The Truth about TV and ADHD

2008-05-22T08:31:00.000-07:00

By ADDitude Magazine

Is watching TV linked to a rise in attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)? Here's what you should know about the causes of ADHD in children.

If you're like a lot of parents, you've probably used your television as a baby-sitter. Anxious to grab a few moments to fix dinner, straighten up, or take a breather, you've turned to the flashy colors and graphics of SpongeBob or Rugrats to mesmerize your child.

Read the entire article here.

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Teen Driving Statistics

2008-05-21T07:24:00.000-07:00

By ParentingMyTeen.com

When your teen starts to drive it is a good idea to be well aware of the teen driving statistics that are out there. A lot of the teen driving statistics may prove to be rather shocking.As a parent, if you search for any information about Teen Driving Statistics you will find statistics similar to those below. I have reviewed various websites to summarize the information from these sources, however, please feel free to search the web for “teen driving statistics” for more websites and information on this subject.
The information allows us to ponder if teen driving needs to be revisited on a national level. How are teen drivers being educated by driving schools? Do we need to increase the amount of time for driver training? How about requiring higher levels of car driving education (not just traffic education, but how do drive a car education)? Should driver’s licenses only be issued at age 18? What are the economic implications to increasing the driving age? We will visit these questions in the next article. For now we need to understand what is happening on our roads today.

We know that the current requirements for driver education are not sufficient. Both commercially and by parents. We can add that a younger age teen is not mature enough to control a vehicle and might as well be considered to be driving a deadly weapon. Teens with permit licenses are driving with their parents in an unmarked family vehicle only increase the likelihood of accidents. Using car magnets that are thick, reflective for the night and are durable can help reduce this likelihood. Identifying these almost 2 million vehicles on the road should be a requirement on a national level.

As parents we must take the responsibility of protecting our children. Should you reconsider your decision the next time your teen asks to take the car?

The Facts from reliable Sources

National Highway Traffic Safety Administration

In 2003, 3,657 (3,827 in 2002) drivers 15 to 20 years old were killed, and an additional 308,000 (324,000 in 2002) were injured, in motor vehicle crashes. Nearly 31 percent of teen drivers killed in motor vehicle crashes in 2003 had been drinking and 74 percent of this group was not wearing their safety belts.

National Safety Council

In 2000, 6,495 people between the ages of 15 and 20 were killed in motor vehicle crashes-the leading cause of death for this age group. And although young drivers represent only 6.6% of the nation’s licensed drivers, they are involved in 14.8% of fatal crashes. The National Safety Council urges all parents to familiarize themselves with the risks associated with young, inexperienced drivers.

Traffic crashes are the number one cause of death among children and young adults.

More than 3,800 young drivers age 15-20 are killed every year in traffic crashes.

More than 326,000 young drivers are injured.

Young drivers are involved in fatal traffic crashes at over twice the rate as the rest of the population.

Exceeding the posted speed limit or driving at an unsafe speed is the most common error in fatal accidents.

About 30% of crashes killing young drivers involve alcohol.

More than 1,000 young drivers lose their lives every year in crashes because of an impaired driver… be it themselves, or someone else.

Sean Mullsteff Teen Driving Foundation

The number one cause of death for 15-20 year olds is car collisions.

This age group makes up 7% of licensed drivers, but suffers 14% of fatalities and 20% of all reported collisions.

53% of teen driver deaths occur on weekends.

Teen drivers killed in motor vehicle collisions had a youth passenger in the automobile 45% of the time.

In 2002, The National Center for Statistics and Analysis reported that 8,278 adolescents (ages 15-20) were involved in fatal crashes.

324,000 teens were injured in collisions in 2002.

65% of teen passenger deaths occur with a teen driving.

Teen lifestyle of staying up late make teen drivers a high risk to have an automobile collision due to drowsiness.

More than any age group, teens are likely to be involved in a single vehicle crash.
Melih Oztalay, CEO
Auto Safety Magnets
The Driving Book -

Covering virtually every scenario a new driver may face–from changing a tire to negotiating privileges with parents to handling a car in bad weather.

Roadside Emergency Kit

With the 29 Piece Roadside Emergency Kit you will be prepared for almost any emergency you may encounter in your automobile.

Sue Scheff: Many learning and behavior problems begin in your grocery cart!

2008-05-20T06:29:00.001-07:00

The Feingold Program

Did you know that the brand of ice cream, cookie, and potato chip you select could have a direct effect on the behavior, health, and ability to learn for you or your children?

Numerous studies show that certain synthetic food additives can have serious learning, behavior, and/or health effects for sensitive people.

The Feingold Program (also known as the Feingold Diet) is a test to determine if certain foods or food additives are triggering particular symptoms. It is basically the way people used to eat before "hyperactivity" and "ADHD" became household words, and before asthma and chronic ear infections became so very common.

Read the entire article here.

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Silencing Skeptics: The Truth About ADHD

2008-05-19T07:14:00.001-07:00

By ADDitude Magazine http://www.additudemag.com/

What is ADHD? Does medication really help? Can adults have ADD? Learn to clear up common misperceptions about ADHD with authority.

The debate about attention deficit disorder (ADD ADHD) is over. O-V-E-R.

Just about every mainstream medical, psychological, and educational organization in the U.S. long ago concluded that ADD is real, and that children and adults with attention deficit disorder benefit from appropriate treatment.Yet, somehow, the world still seems to be filled with self-appointed ADD "experts" - some well-meaning, some sanctimonious - who insist on burdening us with their ill-informed opinions and asking repeatedly, "What is ADD?"

Read the entire article - click here.

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Deliberate Misuse of Inhaler found in 1/4 of Teens

2008-05-18T05:55:00.001-07:00

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff):As a parent advocate, I am learning more and more about inhalant abuse and parents need to be aware of this type of way that kids are getting high today and potentially deadly. Click here and read this article and learn more.

Parents Universal Resource Experts - Sue Scheff - Your Kids Face Challenges

2008-05-16T08:24:00.001-07:00

Connect with Kids is a comprehensive website that offers parenting articles, helpful tips for parents, parent forums and more. They also offer Parenting DVD's on a variety of subjects that affect our kids today. Whether it is Troubled Teens or how to raise successful kids - there is probably a DVD that can help you better understand the issues surrounding our kids today.

Click here for more information and a variety of Parenting DVD's.

Sue Scheff: Cutting Back Sugar to Treat Symptoms in Children

2008-05-15T05:04:00.000-07:00

By ADDitude Magazine

Simple changes in diet, like cutting back on snacks with sugar, could bring out the sweeter side this holiday season in your child with attention deficit disorder (ADD ADHD).

Chances are, you’ve had the following chat with the doctor of your child with attention deficit disorder (ADD ADHD) — probably just before the holidays: “Every time Johnny eats lots of sugary foods, his symptoms of ADHD worsen, and he becomes irritable and hyper. I dread this season because Johnny turns it into unhappy days for everyone.”

Click here for entire article.

Parents Universal Resource Experts - Sue Scheff - Screen Addicts

2008-05-13T10:13:00.001-07:00

By Connect with Kids

Screen Addicts

New research shows that each week our children spend five hours online, six hours on the phone, eight hours playing video games, 12 hours listening to music, and 30 hours watching TV or movies. The American Medical Association reports that five million kids are addicted to videogames. This program explores the dangers in the technology that has overtaken our kids’ lives.

The profiles include four siblings constantly fighting over use of the family computer, a teenager whose addiction to online pornography started when he was 12 years old, and another teen who got hooked on Internet gambling and is now paying off $18,000 in credit card debt.

The program also examines choices parents can make about how to protect their children from these hazards; the research is clear that one parenting style is far more effective than several others.

Parents Universal Resource Experts - Sue Scheff - Parenting in CyberSpace

2008-05-12T12:19:00.001-07:00

Internet Safety Websites to help educate parents to protect their children from Internet Predators:

SafeKids.com
Wired Safety
I-Safe
I Keep Safe

For more information on Internet Predators and Teens - Dateline Series - To Catch a Predator. Check your local listings.

Reputation Defender / My Child -- Know what's online about your child before it can hurt them.

Sue Scheff, Parents Universal Resource Experts (P.U.R.E.)

2008-05-11T05:59:00.000-07:00

Are you struggling with your teen? Visit http://www.helpyourteens.com/ P.U.R.E. - Parents Universal Resource Experts - Parents helping parents.

P.U.R.E. is based on reality - especially with today's teen society of technology including MySpace and other Internet concerns for children. Today we are educating children at much younger ages about substance abuse, sex, and more.

The latest wave of music and lyrics, television, and movies help to contribute to generate a new spin on this age group.

This leads to new areas of concern for parents. We recognize that each family is different with a variety of needs. P.U.R.E. believes in creating Parent Awareness to help you become an educated parent in the teen help industry.

We will give you a feeling of comfort in a situation that can be confusing, stressful, frustrating, and sometimes desperate.Desperate? Confused? Stressed? Anxious? Helplessness? Frustrated? Scared? Exhausted? Fearful? Alone? Drained? Hopelessness? Out of Control? At Wit's End?...

http://www.helpyourteens.com/
http://www.witsendbook.com/
http://www.suescheff.com/

Parents Universal Resource Experts - Sue Scheff - i-Safe - Helping Keeping You Safe Online

2008-05-10T07:22:00.001-07:00

i-SAFE Inc. is the worldwide leader in Internet safety education. Founded in 1998 and endorsed by the U.S. Congress, i-SAFE is a non-profit foundation dedicated to protecting the online experiences of youth everywhere. i-SAFE incorporates classroom curriculum with dynamic community outreach to empower students, teachers, parents, law enforcement, and concerned adults to make the Internet a safer place. Please join us today in the fight to safeguard our children’s online experience.
Click here for more information.

Sue Scheff: Junk Food Commercials by Connect with Kids

2008-05-08T17:40:00.000-07:00

“Parents cannot overlook the persuasiveness of TV. [Children] don’t understand that this is a show, this is a commercial, and they are trying to sell you a product. It all runs together.”

– Rachel Brandeis, registered dietician, American Dietetic Association

The number of overweight kids in the U.S. has doubled since 1980, according to the American Academy of Pediatrics. Some blame the long, inactive hours that children spend watching TV, but new research suggests the reason may be less about how much television children are watching and more about what they’re watching.

Ever since 7-year-old Jake was a toddler, if he saw something on TV that he wanted, “he would point to stuff and say ‘Mama, Mama,’” says Eve Jones, Jake’s mother.

As if on cue, Jake yells from in front of the television, “Mommy! Mommy! Come here fast! I want you to look at this!”

“Sometimes it’s food, sometimes it’s toys,” says Jones.

And when it’s food, says Jones, “It’s always not the healthiest stuff in the world, it’s the stuff with all the food dye, the bright colored stuff, the stuff with sugar in it.”

Many experts believe that the more television kids watch, the more likely they are to be overweight. But is that because they get too little exercise? Not necessarily, says the newest research.

According to the Center for Science in the Public Interest, 9 out of 10 food advertisements on Saturday morning TV are for foods low in nutrients and/or high in fat and sugar.

“I think it is a huge impact and parents cannot overlook the persuasiveness of TV,” says Rachel Brandeis, a registered dietician with the American Dietetic Association. “[Children] don’t understand that this is a show, this is a commercial, and they are trying to sell you a product. It all runs together.”

“Whenever I see people eat something or drink something I go, ‘Mom, can I have something to eat? I’m kind of hungry,’” says Jake.

Today, kids see 40,000 commercials a year – twice the amount of commercials kids saw a generation ago. While current federal guidelines limit the number of commercials that can run during television programs aimed children under the age of 12, experts say parents can also help reduce the cause-and-effect of junk food commercials by limiting screen time and making healthy food choices.

“Remember, you are in charge of what you bring into the home. You can say ‘no,’” says Brandeis.

Tips for Parents

According to the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP):

Children should watch no more than one to two hours of television per day. Parents should watch with children to help interpret messages.

Parents should explain that the purpose of commercials is to make people want things.

Limit the number of commercials your child sees by watching public television stations. You can also record programs without the commercials or buy/rent children's DVDs.

Teach your children to recognize marketing. You can ask the following questions: What is the product being advertised? How are they trying to get you to buy the product? Is there something about the product they are not telling you?

Teach children to read nutritional labels. The FDA regulates the claims manufacturers make on food labels. Here are some common terms as defined by the FDA:

Low-Fat means three grams or less per serving.
Low-Saturated Fat means one gram or less per serving.
Low-Sodium means 140 mg or less per serving.
Low-Calorie means 40 calories or less per serving.
Good source means that one serving of a food contains 10 to 19 percent of the recommended daily allowance for a particular nutrient.

Reduced means that a nutritionally altered product contains at least 25 percent less of a nutrient or calories than the regular, or reference, product.

Light means a nutritionally altered product contains one-third fewer calories or half the fat of the reference food

References
American Academy of Pediatrics
U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA)
American Dietetic Association

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Raising Successful Children

2008-05-07T07:11:00.001-07:00

By Connect by Kids

Against All Odds

Why do some children succeed while others fail? How do children who face tremendous obstacles find the determination, strength and skills to achieve? And what can parents and educators do to help nurture the resiliency in our own kids?

Against All Odds will give you an inside glimpse into the lives of children who are reaching their personal dreams and goals despite challenges such as poverty, drugs, crime, family problems, cultural differences and more.

“No one really travels from a difficult childhood to a successful adulthood alone.” - Mark Katz, Ph.D., Clinical Psychologist and author of Playing a Poor Hand Well and other books about nurturing resiliency in children

Watch Against All Odds with your children, so you can learn and discuss the qualities it takes for young people to succeed. Hear from experts about the best ways to support your kids and keep their resiliency alive and working in their favor. And understand the pressures kids face, and how your children can overcome them.

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Kids Try Different Products for a Legal High

2008-05-06T08:05:00.000-07:00

KTVZ of Central Oregon posted Part Two of a special report, "Teens and Legal Highs". This article seeks to inform parents about the prevalence of inhalant abuse in youth.

A School Resource Officer interviewed said that computer duster is a particularly popular inhalant.

One teenager that the interviewer spoke with says his peers "take the nozzle of that dust off stuff, put it in their mouth, and spray. Your lungs can collapse. Teens also do that with hairspray you put a towel over it. I saw it on TV."

YouTube is also mentioned, as many students are able to find videos of their peers huffing and laughing, without showing any of the negative side effects.

Other legal highs are explored, such as eating nutmeg and poppy seeds. One woman, after losing her poppy plant, said that she "wondered where did my plant go? I realized kids took it to get high. I bet they didn't get high from it, but I miss my plant."

I see this as another argument against restriction of inhalants in retail stores - it's clear that kids aren't looking for a specific product, but for anything to get the high sensation. If one product is banned, next week it will be another popular 'drug' that kids ingest. Should nutmeg be kept locked in cabinets? Should poppy seed products only be sold to adults with valid ID?

Perhaps the focus should be on why youths are so intent on getting high by any means possible. Is it a form of escape? Is peer pressure so overwhelming? Is it just juvenile experimentation? Boredom?

www.inhalant.org

www.helpyourteens.com

www.witsendbook.com

Sue Scheff: Parent Connect - Online Program Allows Parents to Tracks Kids' Grades Step by Step

2008-05-05T16:19:00.000-07:00

A new online program called Parent Connect allows parents to check their children's grades step by step — long before a report card is printed.

But is the technological advance an ace for students and teachers or a hindrance that allows helicopter parents to hover?

Visit http://www.parentconnect.com/ or for more on Good Morning America's Show click here.

http://www.helpyourteens.com/
http://www.witsendbook.com/

Parents Universal Resource Experts - Sue Scheff: Home Drug Testing

2008-05-04T09:22:00.000-07:00

Parents are the #1 Reason Kids Don’t Do Drugs….

Test with HairConfirm Drug Test for a 90 Day Drug History Report!

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Sue Scheff - Parents Universal Resource Experts - IT'S MAY Already! Summer Camp is Around the Corner!

2008-05-02T08:21:00.001-07:00

It is the time of year that many summer programs are actually filling up!

Finding a good summer programs, such as Leadership Programs, can help your child build their self esteem to make better choices as well as motivate them to reach their highest potential.If your child is starting to struggling in school, whether it is peer pressure or other issues, you may want to consider summer alternatives.

CAMP FINDERS is a fantastic resource for parents and a free service to help you find the perfect camp to fit your child's interest.

Visit http://www.helpyourteens.com/

Sue Scheff: What your kids are doing shouldn't be a mystery

2008-05-01T12:40:00.000-07:00

by Connect with Kids

Who’s pressuring your kids? Who’s offering them alcohol or drugs? Who’s talking to them on the Internet?

Whether we’re teachers, parents, counselors…sometimes we just don’t know what’s really going on in a child’s life. If you want to talk to your kids about the challenges they face, but aren’t sure what to say, our programs will help…with real kids sharing their true stories, and advice from experts, educators and parents who have “been there.”

Click here for a fantastic educational resource to help you help your kids!

Do you have a struggling teen? At risk teens? Defiant Teen? Teen Depression? Problem Teen? Difficult Teen? Teen Rage? Teen Anger? Teen Drug Use? Teen Gangs? Teen Runaways? Bipolar? ADD/ADHD? Disrespectful Teen? Out of Control Teen? Peer Pressure?

Find about more about Boarding Schools, Military Schools, Christian Boarding Schools, Residential Treatment Centers, and Therapeutic Boarding Schools.

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) ADHD Teens and Puberty

2008-04-29T14:10:00.001-07:00

By ADDitude Magazine

What parents of ADHD boys should watch for as their sons pass through adolescence.

Until he was 10 or 11, Robert was cheerful and lively, if sometimes distractible and hyper. Then came 12 and 13. “He alternates between couch potato and monster,” says his mother, Anne. “What happened to my sweet little boy?”

What happened were puberty (physical changes) and adolescence (psychological and social changes), which occur when children begin maturing into adults. Some kids begin to “act” like adolescents before puberty; others may not accept the role of adolescent until long after puberty. Whenever they happen, you’re in for a bumpy ride.

Fortunately, boys with attention deficit disorder (ADD ADHD) don’t seem to have more difficulty coping with puberty than others. However, their particular problems and stresses may differ somewhat. Here are some issues to consider.

Refusing medicine
“Raging hormones” can cause intense physical and psychological changes. Teens often find body changes distressing and desperately want to fit in. That’s why many kids who cooperatively took medication in elementary school begin to protest and rebel in their teens; they don’t want to be singled out by going to the school office or health room.

Try to understand and help. If you can find an appropriate medication in a long-acting formulation, your child won’t have to take medicine in school. You can even allow a short trial off medication which may help your teen understand the need to continue taking it. Before discontinuing medication, consult with your family doctor or a mental health professional.

Peer pressure
All children need to feel accepted by their peer group. If the years of having ADHD (and possibly a learning disability) have resulted in poor social skills and limited success with friends, early adolescence may be painful.

The danger for some kids is that they may seek out any peer group that accepts them. Socially rejected ADHD boys frequently latch on to other “misfits” who do not do well in school or sports. The combination of a misfit peer group, the need to be accepted, and low self-esteem places ADHD teens at great risk of alcohol and drug use. Get educated and if you suspect these problems, get help.

Lack of supervision
Experimentation with alcohol, drugs, and sex doesn’t take place on weekend nights. The riskiest hours are between 3 and 6 P.M. on school days. Kids are often unsupervised because both parents work. They frequently visit friends’ houses with no adult present.

Be proactive. If you can’t supervise your teens after school, make sure they’re involved in sports, arts, community service or other activities that are supervised by adults. Keep tabs on where they are and what they’re doing at all times.

Comorbid disorders
People with ADHD are at increased risk of comorbid disorders (two or more conditions that occur at the same time). Depression and anxiety disorders often first show up between the ages of 8 and 12, and again in early adolescence. Watch your child for symptoms, and seek help if you think there’s a problem.

Also watch for signs of Conduct Disorder and Oppositional Defiant Disorder, which are marked by antisocial, hostile, and unusually oppositional behavior. These disorders frequently place impulsive ADHD boys in dangerous, even criminal situations. Intervention is imperative.

Medication changes
Most boys on medication for ADHD do not need to change medication as they enter puberty. Even significant weight increases may not warrant an increased dose. If the dose used earlier in life still works, don’t change it.

The good news is that about half of ADHD kids improve significantly after puberty. Many no longer need medication. The rest will probably need medication through adolescence and possibly into adulthood.

On balance, most ADHD boys pass through adolescence with no more difficulty than others. Becoming a couch potato is not a disorder. However, seek professional advise if your son seems unusually sad, withdrawn, angry, or anxious. Don’t wait for a problem to escalate into a crisis. Even if your concerns are unfounded, it’s better to discuss them with a mental health professional than to wish you had acted sooner.

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) The Feingold Program

2008-04-28T07:23:00.000-07:00

The Feingold Program (also known as the Feingold Diet) is a test to determine if certain foods or food additives are triggering particular symptoms. It is basically the way people used to eat before "hyperactivity" became a household word, and before asthma and chronic ear infections became so very common. Used originally as a diet for allergies, improvement in behavior and attention was first noticed as a "side effect." It is a reasonable first step to take before (or with if already begun) drug treatment for any of the symptoms listed on the Symptoms page.

Visit http://www.feingold.org/

Sue Scheff (P.U.R.E.) Making Peace with Your Defiant Child: Discipline & ODD

2008-04-27T07:10:00.000-07:00

Discipline strategies for parents of children with oppositional defiant disorder - a common partner to ADHD.

Click here for the entire article.

ADDitude Magazine has comprehensive articles on ADD/ADHD in regards to both children and adults.

As a parent advocate (Sue Scheff) my organization - Parents' Universal Resource Experts - is about parents helping parents and bringing you valuable stories, articles and more to help you with today's kids.

Parents Universal Resuorce Experts (Sue Scheff) Single Parents: How to Raise ADHD Children – Alone

2008-04-26T06:37:00.001-07:00

Seven expert strategies to help single parents raise confident, successful children with ADHD.

Click Here for Entire Article.

ADDitude Magazine offers great information for parents and adults of ADD/ADHD. As a single parent with an ADHD child, this article offers a lot of insight.

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Websites Promoting Cyber Safety

2008-04-25T08:11:00.001-07:00

Connect with Kids constantly keeps parents updated on today’s kids and issues surrounding them. Today’s techy generation need even stronger parenting.

Reputation Defender MyChild is a great place for parents to start in keeping their child’s privacy “private!”

Parents Universal Resource Experts - Sue Scheff - Rebellious and Defiant Teens

2008-04-23T07:39:00.000-07:00

Parent's Universal Resource Experts has found that children that have ODD (Oppositional Defiance Disorder) are very confrontational and need to have life their own way. A child does not have to be diagnosed ODD to be defiant. It is a trait that some teens experience through their puberty years.

Defiant teens, disrespectful teens, angry teens and rebellious teens can affect the entire family.An effective way to work with defiant teens is through anger and stress management classes. If you have a local therapist*, ask them if they offer these classes. Most will have them along with support groups and other beneficial classes.

In today's teens we are seeing that defiant teens have taken it to a new level. Especially if your child is also ADD/ADHD, the ODD combination can literally pull a family apart.

You will find yourself wondering what you ever did to deserve the way your child is treating you. It is very sad, yet very real. Please know that many families are experiencing this feeling of destruction within their home. Many wonder "why" and unfortunately each child is different with a variety of issues they are dealing with. Once a child is placed into proper treatment, the healing process can begin.

If you feel your teen is in need of further Boarding School, Military School or Program Options, please complete our Information Request Form.

Find about more about Boarding Schools, Military Schools, Christian Boarding Schools, Residential Treatment Centers, and Therapeutic Boarding Schools.

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Teen Vandalism and Mischief

2008-04-21T13:51:00.000-07:00

Teens and Vandalism

The US Department of Justice defines vandalism as “willful or malicious destruction, injury, disfigurement, or defacement of any public or private property.” Vandalism can encompass many different acts, including graffiti, public unrest, rioting, and other types of criminal mischief, like breaking windows or arson. Even seemingly harmless pranks like egging and toilet papering homes are considered vandalism in most states.Unfortunately, many acts of vandalism may go unnoticed in the home, because teens can easily avoid bringing any evidence back with them.

This is why it is of particular importance that parents make an effort to know where their teens are at all times. Keeping an open dialogue with your teen about his schedule and friends can help you to better keep tabs on him.

A teen that knows his parents care is more likely to avoid criminally mischievous behaviors in the first place.If you suspect your teen is engaging in vandalism, don’t be afraid to discuss your fears with your teen. While again, it is important to not be accusatory, you should leave no doubt in your teen’s mind that you believe any act of vandalism- big or small- is wrong. Often, teens think vandalism is a ‘victimless crime’; in other words, they don’t believe they’re hurting anyone by spray painting graffiti on a brick building, or tossing a few eggs at a neighbor’s car.

This kind of thinking is your perfect segue into teaching your teen just how wrong vandalism can be. When your teen defiantly tells you that “nobody got hurt,” explain to them that by spray-painting the façade of his high school, they costs the taxpayers (including you) money to have the graffiti covered and the crime investigated. Remind them that the money for these repairs has to come from somewhere, and that every dollar wasted to fix vandalism is a dollar that must now be cut from somewhere else.Maybe the school will have one less dance, or will be forced to cut out arts programs or programs for under privileged students. If your teen has been egging homes, point out the waste of food that some families cannot even afford.

Remind them that someone will have to scrape the dried egg off your neighbor’s windshield, possibly making him late for work, costing him time and money.Read more about Criminal

Mischief with Teens - Click Here.

Do you have a struggling teen? At risk teens? Defiant Teen? Teen Depression? Problem Teen? Difficult Teen? Teen Rage? Teen Anger? Teen Drug Use? Teen Gangs? Teen Runaways? Bipolar? ADD/ADHD? Disrespectful Teen? Out of Control Teen? Peer Pressure?

Find about more about Boarding Schools, Military Schools, Christian Boarding Schools, Residential Treatment Centers, and Therapeutic Boarding Schools.

Sue Scheff: Girls Dating Older Boys

2008-04-18T07:04:00.000-07:00

By Connect with Kids

“Girls, definitely, tell me that they feel like they have to do the sexual requests, they have to honor the sexual requests of their boyfriends, or they will get dumped. And there are a lot of girls that are feeling pressure that way.”

– Dr. Nancy McGarrah, Ph.D., licensed psychologist

Typically, parents worry when their daughters begin dating, but they really worry when their daughter goes out with an older boy. According to a recent study, parents have good reason to be concerned.

Sarah is 19 and her boyfriend is 22.

“Because I am dating an older guy … I am more open to alcohol, just because I can ask him, ‘Hey, can you go to the store and buy me something?’” says Sarah Lim, 19.

She says another risk of dating an older guy is being pressured into having sex.

“I think a lot of guys, especially in high school, will go for younger girls just because they’ll give it up, you know,” says Lim.

In fact, according to a study by the non-profit group Child Trends, one in five girls has dated a boy at least three years older than she, and 10 percent say they’ve had sex with an older boy before they turned 16.

“Girls, definitely, tell me that they feel like they have to do the sexual requests, they have to honor the sexual requests of their boyfriends, or they will get dumped. And there are a lot of girls that are feeling pressure that way,” says Dr. Nancy McGarrah, Ph.D., licensed psychologist.

What’s more, according to the study, girls who date older guys are less likely to use protection, more likely to become pregnant, and twice as likely to acquire a sexually transmitted disease (STD).

“Frequently, the younger girl is naïve. Sometimes she doesn’t have the assertiveness to stand up for herself and demand that a condom be used,” says McGarrah.

“When guys are older…girls will trust them. ‘Oh, he knows what he’s talking about. He has more experience,’” says Lim.

Experts say parents need to set ground rules, such as they can only date someone one grade above or below, and only go on group dates until they’re 16. And if your daughter argues, experts say:

“Explain to them that you trust them and you know that they are a mature person, but at the same time there are different levels of maturity. And just like they are not ready to get married, they are not ready to have babies, they are also not ready to be in relationships with people significantly older than they are,” says McGarrah.

Tips for Parents

When a boyfriend or girlfriend uses verbal insults, mean language, nasty putdowns, gets physical by hitting or slapping, or forces someone into sexual activity, it's an important warning sign of verbal, emotional or physical abuse. Ask yourself, does my boyfriend or girlfriend: (Nemours Foundation)

Get angry when I don't drop everything for him or her?

Criticize the way I look or dress, and say I'll never be able to find anyone else who would date me?

Keep me from seeing friends or from talking to any other guys or girls?

Want me to quit an activity, even though I love it?

Ever raise a hand when angry, like he or she is about to hit me?

Try to force me to go further sexually than I want to?

Hopefully, you and your significant other are treating each other well. Not sure if that's the case?

Take a step back from the dizzying sensation of being swept off your feet and think about whether your relationship has these qualities:

Mutual respect. Does he or she “get” how cool you are and why? The key is that your BF or GF is into you for who you are — for your personality, great sense of humor, love of the same movies, commitment to sports or the arts, etc. Does your partner listen when you say you're not comfortable doing something and then back off right away? Respect in a relationship means that each person values who the other is — and would never challenge the other person's boundaries. (Nemours Foundation)

Trust. You're talking with a guy from French class and your boyfriend walks by. Does he completely lose his cool or keep walking because he knows you'd never cheat on him? It's okay to get a little jealous sometimes — jealousy is a natural emotion. But how a person reacts when feeling jealous is what matters. There's no way you can have a healthy relationship if you don't trust each other. (Nemours Foundation)

Support. It's not just in bad times that your partner should support you. Some people are great when your whole world is falling apart, but can't take being there when things are going right (and vice versa). In a healthy relationship, your significant other is there with a shoulder to cry on when you find out your parents are getting divorced and to celebrate with you when you get the lead in a play. (Nemours Foundation)

Good communication. You've probably heard lots of stuff about how men and women don't seem to speak the same language. We all know how many different meanings the little phrase "no, nothing's wrong" can have, depending on who's saying it! But what's important is to ask if you're not sure what he or she means, and speak honestly and openly so that the miscommunication is avoided in the first place. (Nemours Foundation)

Think about the qualities you value in a friendship and see how they match up with the ingredients of a healthy relationship. Work on developing those good qualities in yourself — they make you a lot more attractive to others. (Nemours Foundation)

References
Nemours Foundation